Assault.

We used to live in a proper society, man. It wasn't perfect but it was pretty damn good. People put in a honest day's work, ate dinner with their families, then the Worldwide Leader In Sports took the wheel from there. It may seem crazy now, but nothing topped turning on PTI, rolling directly into SportsCenter, then jumping into whatever poison you picked in slate of games for the night. 

Now we have dancing sprites who are professionals at finding out football news before everyone else throwing their titties in our face on a Monday night. I hope Kirk Cousins is happy wherever he is right now for unleashing this on all of us because we used to live in a proper society.

At least we have the Manning brothers in our lives now.