BARSTOOL FINANCE: Target Misses Their Own... Well... You Know

Large6/08/2022 1:35 AM

Listen up!

I left Wall Street 4 years ago after sleeping my way to the middle, BUT...

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In hopes that I can extract even more money from this firm, I will be teaming up with Barstool's financial newsletter editor, Tyler Morin, to create new & exciting finance content across all platforms.

For example:

Looking at markets today, I see Target took it on the chin after the company's inventory checks found they are sitting on a ton of supply with nearly no demand.

To remedy this, they are lowering forecasts and throwing a fire sale on shit nobody needs. CEO Brian Cornell basically wants to wash his hands of the losses they incur in the next month, or so, and start to rebuild next quarter.

The news hit most of the big box retailers, but TGT miraculously closed down only 2.5%… Mainly because shares were down 25% after they 'Amber Heard'ed the bed' on earnings less than a month ago.

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You see what I just did there?

I just gave you a couple of sentences on a well-read news story that is ancient history to people in my old industry, but probably new news to Barstool's core audience.

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Plus I changed the phrase "shit the bed" to "Amber Hearded the bed"… Feel free to use that, if you'd like.

Now I'll probably use Ms. Heard as an excuse to pepper some cheesecake in this blog…

And for those who want a little more on the TGT story, plus an idea of what else went on in today's markets, I would direct you to tomorrow morning's edition of the aforementioned newsletter- The Water Coolest.

On top of all this, even though neither Tyler nor I have the desire and/or skillset to advise people on how to invest THEIR money, we have decided to put a tiny bit of OUR OWN money (NO outside investors) into a trading account to invest with the help of input from our inevitable HUUUUUUGE crowd of followers.

That will be highlighted in a weekly video series called The Family Office that will drop every weekend starting this week on a YouTube channel even I have yet to subscribe to because we created it earlier today.

So more visibility on the blog… A daily newsletter… AND a weekly short-form video series that will hopefully become interactive.

Barstool Finance is starting to take shape.

Take a report.

-Large

Oh.

And I cannot speak for Tyler, but unless I am without my laptop, I will NEVER publish a finance blog that does not contain at least a little smut… And Amber Heard in an open-top is just not enough.