Surviving Barstool S4 Ep. 2 | No One is Safe With Survival at StakeWATCH NOW

Assessing My Latest Performance On "The Dozen"

WARNING- This blog contains spoilers for the first match of The Dozen Tournament between Out Of Office and Big Screamin' Honkers. No other matches will be spoiled, but if you haven't watched and don't want to know the result, I suggest you turn back now.

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I choked. It's as simple as that. This was an all-time pathetic performance. It was John Starks in Game 7 of the 1994 Finals laying bricks against the Rockets. Don't get me wrong, would a good performance have won us this match? No. Coley was unconscious and played like a defending champion, but 3 points? That's going to haunt me until next season. If there was ever any doubt about whether or not I deserved Rookie Of The Year, that argument ended Monday night.

The questions didn't fall into my wheelhouse, and the ones that did never came to my head. When Jeff asked us what janitor mopped the floor when Michigan lost to Notre Dame in the Round of 64 in 2016, I knew we were fucked. I probably would've known the movie question, but we never got there because we got our asses beat. I still talked Duggs out of "My New Haircut" and somehow got it in my head that Nate McLouth played for the Nationals. Brutal stuff man.

This will probably shock no one, but I'm a nervous wreck. Thankfully, I have the advantage of creating content in a home I've lived in my whole life with nothing except a ring light, my laptop, and a wonky microphone. I like that setup, it makes me comfortable, but when I walk into a studio space, and you got cameras and lights everywhere, it had me shook. I can't lie about that. I tried to pass it off as a "hey shucks, whatcha going to do?" moment, but I was pissed. If not for everything about this week other than the trivia was perfect and memorable, I would've been devastated, and this will be a running theme next year. I'll still contend that I was probably a top 5-10 player this season. I don't believe I was just someone who got lucky and started hot, but no one will remember that in the grand scheme. Championships are like sex (two things I know nothing about), how you finish is what's most important.

Icarus may have flown too close to the sun. I flamed out bad. My ability to perform in the clutch will be questioned for a long time, and rightfully so. It was an enjoyable experience and a fantastic time. Even though I'm busting balls, Jeff Lowe has created an incredible product, and I'm proud of him. At the same time, this one will stick with me. I have to be better. I'll be back with a vengeance next May. Thanks to everyone who supported Out Of Office. Sorry I couldn't do more for ya. We'll be back.