Dave Roberts is an Asshole For Pulling Clayton Kershaw After 80 Pitches, 6 Outs From A Perfect Game

Dave Roberts should be straight up executed in a public venue for this move. Nothing beats the in-game break where they cut away to the ninth inning and everyone's sitting on the edge of their seat. Even if you hate the Dodgers and Kershaw. Even if you're a diehard Twins fan. Even if you don't even give the slightest of fucks about MLB. The nerves behind a perfect game are simply unmatched and Dave Roberts has stolen that moment from me. A literal and physical chemical boost to my brain. The kinda high you chase as a sports fan your whole life. And one of the best doses of the serotonin gets robbed right from under us by Dave Roberts. 80 pitch perfect game with 2 innings to go and you yank Kershaw. Grow some balls Dave. 

If you're Kershaw you absolutely HAVE to put up a fight about coming out. Don't sandbag me because you've made a bazillion dollars. Don't hang your hat on a quarantine title and act like you've accomplished this before. Passan says perfectly that a No Hitter is one thing, but 23 perfect games is completely different. Kershaw should also grow some balls. I know LA guys are naturally bigger pussies but come on Clayton. Did you not see Scottie Schefler just win the Masters? Matt Stafford is probably so salty right now. You can't even try for the boys? 

This is where we've landed as people. Not just sports fans or baseball guys. But more society as a whole. 7 innings is good enough so why push for 8. Who gives a shit about history. What about the kids who skipped school in Minneapolis to watch you pitch Clayton? What about all the adults who are too stupid to realize the last sentence was entirely sarcastic? I am deeply disturbed with the trend of doing well enough. I demand excellence. Go chase that perfect game and be the big swinging dick everyone knows you are. 

As for the computers, I hate your guts. This was a math decision and there's just too much information out there. How do you confidently pull a perfect game at 80 pitches? I'll tell you. Some massive loser with a quant background has conclusively proven that it's actually bad for business. 

Well fuck that guy and all his hardware. And fuck Dave Roberts for listening to him and definitely Clayton Kershaw for not throwing a temper tantrum. We got sports history on the line here boys… let's go out and act like it. 

I'm sure some people respect Clayton Kershaw's efforts and Dave Roberts decision making but this is just a huge miss for MLB. Everything that's wearing down the sport can be summed up in this move. A slamdunk 1st ballot and potentially unanimous hall of fame pitcher in the 4th quarter of his career just gave up the ball in pursuit of a perfect game not even one week into the 2022 season. And there's people out there who call this sport soft? Imagine that. 

You can now roast me for my old man takes. I've certainly seen enough.