Live EventGet Ready for Christmas Football with the Barstool Sports AdvisorsWatch Now

Blind Mystic Prophet, Baba Vanga, Says That 2022 Is Actually Going To Be WAY Worse Than 2020 And 2021

We did a Dogwalk on this blind bitch way back in 2019. August 2019 to be exact. She has predicted all sorts of shit from nuclear sub disasters, to the rise of ISIS, to 9/11, to America electing a black man to be the 44th President. Normally I would just dismiss shit like this out of hand, but she is from a strange part of the world and is blind. Somehow in my brain that gives her credibility. She is better at predicting shit than Nostradamus ever was. No idea where her predictions were about Covid-19. That's a big miss by her to be honest, but let's see if she can rebound in 2022. Here is what she is predicting for the next year

 

--A virtual reality takeover for the coming year

Uh...no shit. We are basically already there. Some people think we are living in a simulation right now. If we are it is time to pull the cartridge out and blow on it because this game is fucking broken. 

--Another pandemic, this time discovered in Siberia, that is caused by a frozen virus that will be released by climate change

I mean what is another pandemic? Can't do shit about this one anyways. Just throw another one at us. Of course it is from Russia. First China, now Putin. 

--Many cities will face water shortages that will result in political consequences as alternative solutions are used

I think most people would welcome political consequences at this point, but water shortages sound bad. Glad we live next to a giant lake and I got one of those office water cooler things for Christmas, not to brag. Y'all are fucked. 

--The invasion of earth by aliens with the arrival of an asteroid

This is 1000% happening. The government has been preparing us for this. Little leaks here and there. Sightings confirmed. NASA is doing a focus group

People might be thrown off by the term "asteroid", but she said "steel birds" when predicting 9/11. You telling me this doesn't look like an asteroid?

--Famine in India due to a drop in temperatures that will result in locusts to attack crops

Is the planet getting hotter or colder? Make up your mind, you blind dead bitch. Locust problems are already happening around the world though. India is trying everything to stop them including spreading insecticides with drones

--More earthquakes and tsunamis with ‘intense bouts of floods’ in Australia and parts of Asia

I mean if all the other stuff happens, who will even notice if Australia gets flooded? Australia seems cool with all their sweet animals and hot chicks who apparently live in bikinis 24/7, but like…if Aliens are taking all my drinking water and forcing us to stay in our homes because of a Siberia Virus while I am trying to beat the simulation of my own life then I don't really give a fuck about Down Under. 

PS: Send us your favorite snake draft moments. The 100th episode is coming up soon (which feels impossible). If you have moments like this one let me know