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Now That's What I Call Christmas Mass!

Mercedes. Getty Images.

Christmastime is here. Advent calendars have been hung. Wreaths, lights, and an abundance of poinsettias fill your local parish. Your priest has gone from that nice rose robe to a purple so you know that means we're getting close to the big one:

Christmas Eve Mass. 

Now, I know a lot of hardcore folks probably grew up going on Christmas Day, or definitely the Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve, but I am not one of those people. I am a part of a much larger collection of my fellow Catholic brothers and sisters.  I am your typical middle class American catholic family Creaster. You know - the ones everyone seems to complain about but in all reality are a part of. We get uber dressed up for one Mass a year and celebrate together around 4pm on Christmas Eve so we can get on with the party Christmas Eve night while nursing a hangover on Christmas Day opening gifts with Christmas Vacation on. We gather in the gym because brother, the church itself is reserved for the regulars, the hardcores, the starting lineup of the parish. 

We don't wear a coat into the gymnasium on Christmas Eve because it's going to be overly crowded, which shouldn't come as a surprise because your gym is the size of a small barn the kid whose dad runs a family owned HVAC company has in their backyard, and guess what! you gotta put the foldable chairs back once Father Tom walks down the aisle after communion. Nothing worse than working up a sweat in your red tie and christmas sweater only to head to your grandma's basement afterwards where the fire will already be burning and that one cousin wants to wrestle you for some reason. 

Getting to Christmas Eve mass is always an absolute shit show, too. I'm not talking about traffic or the route there, but the process of your family getting ready. I think the stats would show for every kid a family has that equals out to two meltdowns leading up to Christmas Eve mass. Sister hates the dress, one kid doesn't like the way the new shoes that grandma got just for him constricts his feet, Mom is mad at dad. Dad then gets mad at the kids because mom is mad at him. Tears are flowing. One kid who isn't close to being ready locks themselves in their room leading to dad almost beating down the door while mom (for the 5th time that day) invokes the threat of no presents. All to spend an hour and 45 minutes (have to get there super early to reserve spots) with the lord and the rest of the judgemental pricks that your parents already don't like just to seem like a family that has it all together. 

This is Christmas. But once that's all said and done, and you've finally settled into the cold metal of the folding chair three seats away from your sister because you had to be separated in order to behave, you can find some saving grace in the Christmas tunes played at mass. Introducing this year's hottest Holiday album: 

Now That's What I Call Christmas Mass


1. O Come All Ye Faithful

Great kickstarter. No brainer opening tune. 

2. Angels We Have Heard On High

Maybe the most church song in the history of church songs?? Let me hear it from the adult choir!

3. Away In A Manger

Serves as a nice change of pace featuring a second grade little girl making her way to the mic to shyly, but bravely, rip this christmas classic about baby Jesus. Mom sneakily but not so sneakily makes her way down the aisle to the front to record. Side note - Is Father asleep???

4. We Three Kings

Obvious preparing of the gifts song here. 

5. Silent Night

Communion has begun. 

6. Let There Be Peace On Earth

Not really a Christmas song but it's seemingly always played at this mass? Guess just driving home the peaceful, joyful, happy time that is Christmas and the birth of Christ. 

7. Ave Maria

Communion is ending but the soloist continues to sing this because it's very important every major holiday or mass we have Ave Maria played. 

8. Oh Holy Night

9. Hark The Herald Angels Sing

It wrapped up the best Christmas movie of all time (It's A Wonderful Life) so of course it's the perfect tune for the end of Christmas Mass. 

10. Joy To The World

This song and Christmas Mass go hand-in-hand. They're like having turkey on Thanksgiving or opening presents on Christmas morning or your uncle arguing with your other aunt (who married into the family) about the vaccine at the family christmas dinner. Ya just gotta have it. An epic wrap up with the adult choir absolutely SENDING it from their chests to put a nice bow on this Christmas eve mass.

Merry Christmas.