Machine Gun Kelly Is Coming Out With A Line Of Nail Polish For "Introverts, Newbies, Creators and No-Conformists" (This Is Real)

THE MUSICIAN SAYS THE BRAND, TITLED UN/DN LAQR, IS ‘THE WILLY WONKA OF WHAT BEAUTY IS TO BECOME’

After years of flaunting intricate nail looks on the red carpet (see his iHeartRadio Music Awards acrylics from last May for evidence), Machine Gun Kelly has officially launched his own nail polish brand.

The beauty line, titled UN/DN LAQR, features ten classic shades of nail polish – chosen so that the colours can be worn regardless of the season. The range includes a black hue called ‘Depressionist’, paying homage to when MGK would colour his nails with Sharpies during middle school; a red-orange shade, ‘25 to Life’, named by goth girlfriend Megan Fox; and a dark green shade, ‘Mary Jane’, because MGK “is weed”, we guess.

This is unbelievable. Absolutely unbelievable. I am on record loving when anyone and everyone wears nail polish (much to the disappointment of every bumfuck homophobe in the comment section) but.... I think I change my mind? Does MGK not realize he's doing the exact OPPOSITE of what he intends to with this line? He's creating it for the "non-conformists" and making it "accessible" for those who are hesitant about dipping their toes into the Nail Polish pool...by making it sound as lame as humanly possible? I'm all for encouraging creativity. I'm all for guys wearing nail polish. I love things in excess, and fashion is fun. But if my mans comes up to me with his freshly painted "25 to Life" Orange MGK nails? We're done. It's over. I can't take that seriously. 

Each polish in the collection is crafted with a thick brush, so that the collection is accessible to all people, of all beauty capabilities. “I’m not expecting people to be nail artists, right? I want it to be accessible,” the musician told Allure, explaining that he wants the brand to be for everyone, regardless of how they identify. “I mean, I’m hoping aliens, at some point when they reveal themselves, are fully immersed in the UN/DN stuff.”

MGK was "inspired by" drawing on his nails with Sharpie as a kid? I mean, I guess a lot of us did that...idk. The more I shit on this idea, the worse I feel about it I think, because it's genuinely kind of sad? I think MGK really DOES want to make a difference and touch the souls of Sad Boyz everywhere? Or, as stated above, is he only looking to get Aliens on deck? 

Kelly also explained that the polish might help fans gain confidence in day-to-day life. “A lot of my music was for the introverts, for the people scared to be vulnerable. I know that a lot of people don’t have the external courage to start conversations with people. I’m like that — I’m super shy when it comes to starting conversations,” he said. “When I went and got coffee, one of the first times when I actually had my nails done, I went to the counter and the guy was like, ‘Wow, your nails are so beautiful.’ It makes you want to be open to the conversation.”

He added: “You spend time taking care of yourself and paying attention to a detail and then somebody else appreciates that detail. (It’s) for sure a social connection."

LOL Holy shit. Okay. I can't make fun of this anymore, I'm legitimately sad hearing this. I wouldn't label myself as an introvert, but if people are out here struggling so hard to make human connections, and nail polish is the ONLY way to start a conversation? Sure. I'm genuinely asking - is it that hard to make friends? Or to have a casual conversation with a stranger? Maybe I spent too much time as a kid watching my Grandpa speak to every single human or waitress he came in contact with, but if MGK's "Depressionist" shade is going to single handedly stop social anxiety? I guess we should get on board. 

PS, it's a good thing they clarified WHICH girlfriend MGK was getting help from, not just Megan Fox, but GOTH GIRLFRIEND Megan Fox.