Ice Cream Has Become a Controlled Substance
Last night I got a good old hankering for Icecream that I've been able to stave off the past couple of months but a hot sweaty day in the city definitely deserves some Ice cream at the end of it.
Anyway, I relapsed and found myself in a 24/7 CVS looking for some of the good stuff. Went up to the fridge and saw the perfectly portioned small ice cream cups that if I bought wouldn't cause me to eat a whole pint. But if I bought a pint I could try to make it last the whole week... Just as I made my decision (A compromise, not the small cup or a pint but a Chipwich that if I ended up eating all of wouldn't be that bad but its more than a small cup) I realized the doors were locked to the icecream fridge.
Wtf is this shit? I can understand the beer fridge being locked so minors don't shoplift booze, but why the Icecream? Did it have something to do with the sticker and trying to get people to eat healthier? Then why isn't the candy locked up?
Do I press the button? Did by some twist of fate a new local ordinance ban ice cream sales after a certain time of night? I was kinda pissed. The whole point of going to a CVS and grabbing a quick pint to scan at the self-checkout was the ease of escape and lack of judgment. I like ice cream late at night, so you are telling me I now need a security guard to come to open the fridge for me, watch me pick out what I am eating, and then lock it when I am done?
So I press the button, the guy comes over I ask him:
"Hey man what's up with the lock on the ice cream?"
He hits me with a,
"People are crazy man."
It was pretty late and he was definitely working a long night shift that night so I wasn't going to pester him with any more questions.
I check out, walk home, and just sort of dumbfounded how we've gotten to a point as a society that ice cream needs to be locked up like something under the jurisdiction of the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, and Explosives. Was it something I was just missing, did it have to do with the sticker next to the handle and I was just naive?
So I googled it.
Boom
So I kinda remember seeing like one or two videos 2 years ago like this, but I never ever thought its repercussions would be felt 2 years later throughout a global pandemic to my (formerly) fat ass staring a fridge.
Turns out people have been protecting the ice cream aisle like Fort Knox.
This may be common knowledge to other people but I had no idea. There is a chance this blog never sees the daylight because the blog editors know all about this topic and I'm an oblivious dumb dumb. I kinda just moved and for the past 2 years, I have either eaten ice cream from a cafeteria or a local ice cream place I didn't want to go out of business during covid, so I would go a little too much with the pretense of supporting small businesses. But it is still crazy these changes were sort of made permanent.
So there we have it, Ice cream is now a controlled substance (no it doesn't actually fall under the controlled substances act, but it is a substance and it is being controlled).