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Jacob deGrom Became The First Pitcher To Be Checked For Sticky Stuff, Which He Obviously Aced Like Everything Else He Does

You know what? I can't even get mad at Major League Baseball for testing Jacob deGrom for sticky stuff first. When you put up the type of numbers he has put up the last few years, you better test for something. I personally would've tested his blood to see if he is an alien from another planet considering this is how he opened tonight's game after leaving his last start with shoulder soreness.

Every pitcher will get tested for something they knew they were being tested for, which if recent baseball history has taught us anything, will no doubt lead to low positive numbers along with a few caught cheating. But Manfred's Clown Crew will have to try harder to nab the most unfair pitcher in the game. Maybe the should doublecheck Jake's glove for sticky stuff after this.

JK, he's just fucking better at this sport then the mortals he faces.