Ricky Schroder Achieves Maximum Former Child Star Douchiness by Harassing a Costco Employee
You can forgive yourself if the name Ricky Schroder doesn't resonate with you. To a child of the '80s, he'll forever be remembered for playing Jon Voight's son in "The Champ," which is one of those movies that could make a Marine drill instructor cry like Ellen Degeneres getting pepper sprayed. He followed that up with a nice 100+ episode run on "Silver Spoons," one of those interchangeable '80s family sitcoms that had all had theme songs written by Alan Thicke. As an adult he changed his name to "Rick," and produced that same IMDB page 90% of Hollywood has, with brief stints on "24" and "NYPD Blue" and probably 17 appearances on "Law & Order" that I would've found if I felt like looking. Now it seems like he's relegated to Dolly Parton-produced made-for-TV movies. And his greatest performance of his career, writing and directing and starring as himself, being a total prick to a retail worker.
Look, who among us is not sick to hot, steaming, miserable death with wearing masks? There aren't enough adjectives to adequately describe how much wearing them sucks. And I say that as someone whose appearance is definitely improved immensely by covering half my face. It's perfectly legitimate to hate masks. To resent them. To question their efficacy. And to long for the day you can hold a burning party.
But how hard is it to aim your bitching a little bit higher than the guy working the door at the wholesale club? The foot soldier in this battle. The pawn in this game of life. A guy just doing what he's told in order to keep the store compliant with state law in order to keep his manager off his case and keep a paycheck coming in. A man who deserves to be treated with a shred of human decency instead of being the target of your unhinged harangue.
And yet the way this Costco worker handles himself is a thing of absolute perfection. If there was an award for every day life, he'd win Best Actor in a Short Subject Drama for the way he passive/aggressively handles Schroder's douchebaggery, while pretending he actually has fucks to give about the indignant crackpot shoving a camera in his face. You almost can't hear Schroder demand his legion of a dozen or so lunatic followers cancel their Costco membership over the guy's audible eyeroll. He's no doubt had a good 15 months of practice listening to this same nutty speech and isn't impressed that this time it's being delivered by the man who played Cruiser Cop #2 in "I Woke Up Early the Day I Died."
By all accounts, we're in the final stages of his kabuki theater we've all been legally compelled to take part in. We probably have to play along for another few weeks or a month or two. And as the restrictions don't get rolled back as fast as we'd like, is it too big an ask that we save our complaints for the people calling the shots, and not the person just doing their jobs? Costcos in California still make you wear a mask. They also require you to wear shoes. And pants. Regardless of whether you were making movies when you 10 years old or not.
P.S. As if you needed any further proof that being famous when you're little messes with a person's head, here it is.