Surviving Barstool | New Episodes Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday 8PM ETTUNE IN

This Stupid Graphic Is Everything That's Wrong With The Coverage Of That Egomaniac Known As Sister Jean

Here we go again with this bullshit. Listen, Loyola Chicago is a good story. Porter Moser is a hell of a coach who is ready to parlay this run again into a major job. They defend their ass off and they have a guy with the perfect name Cam Krutwig, and a perfect mustache leading the way.

Paul Sancya. Shutterstock Images.

But you know what the worst part about this all is? More attention to that egomaniac Sister Jean. Quite literally every camera break is to her sitting there. All she's doing is press conference and interview after interview. Literally today I've seen quotes from her like it matters. 

You think Oregon State gives a shit what numbers you say Sister Jean? You think they can't log onto KenPom like you did with your Illinois prayer? You don't think they can google stats? Give me a break. This slurp fest with her ability to read stats is ridiculous. I'm more impressed that Jeff D Lowe can name every region with location and announcers. That's a skill. Saying Illinois gets 50% layups? Fuck outta here. 

And then we got her roasting the Big 10. I see you trying to get back on my good side, but let's not act like the 1 team advancing means they shouldn't have been in the Tournament. 

Was Ohio State not supposed to be in the Tournament? Was Rutgers not supposed to be there? Upsets happen. It's the NCAA Tournament. It's why Loyola is even a story. And sure you can say, Hey Reags, don't let this lady get to you. I can't help it. I want to hear more stories about Lucas Williamson. I want to hear more stories about Cam Krutwig and his harmonica. Tell me about Tate Hall and Braden Norris. Those are the guys, you know, winning games. Not some fan in the stands. 

Which brings me to this bizarre graphic. Let me know when Sister Jean hits a jumper. She's for sure a liability defensively. No way she can attack a 2-3 zone. Zero chance she knows how to come off the flare screen. Why are we pretending like she's the one snapping fingers here as Thanos? That shit should be Porter Moser. So much for not being a distraction, Sister Jean. Everywhere I look it's Sister Jean this and Sister Jean that. 

Because of her I say, go Oregon State. I hope Gary Payton sits right next to her. 

PS: I refuse to stay silent when she's throwing low blows here at me.