Breaking Down The INSANE Paramount+ Announcements
ICYMI, ViacomCBS had a giant dump of news regarding the newly rebranded CBS All-Access AKA PAramount+. Lets break down all the major players. This is a long-ass blog so here is a glossary if you wana jump for what you're interested in.
1. Sports
2. Documentaries/Docuseries
3. CBS All Access crap
4. Music
5. Kids & Family
6. Reality TV
7. Comedy
8. Scripted Dramas
9. Movies
SPORTS
They're basically going to have all the CBS stuff and more including THE NFL ON CBS, The Masters, NCAA Division I Men’s Basketball Championship, PGA TOUR, SEC ON CBS, The PGA Championship, National Women’s Soccer League, UEFA Champions League, UEFA Europa League and UEFA Europa Conference League.
They're also going to host CONCACAF and some other soccer leagues if that is your bag. Also, they'll host Inside the NFL and CBS Sports HQ.
DOCUMENTARIES/DOCUSERIES
The Lie Detector - A Texas Ranger who for decades led the department’s investigations into its most twisted and high profile murder cases takes viewers behind the scenes of those crimes and into the minds of the people who committed them. The Lie Detector is a true crime docuseries from the Emmy® and Peabody Award-winning producers of 48 Hours in a new and compelling original format exclusively for Paramount+.
True crime will always play. It appeals to the morbid side of everyone's brain that wants to see some sick shit and this is no exception. Plus, 2 words that instantly make it move are "Texas Ranger"
76 Hours - A look at life in the earliest days of the COVID-19 crisis in Wuhan, China, the Oscar Shortlisted 76 Days focuses on frontline hospital workers and their patients, bearing witness to the human resilience that persists in times of profound tragedy.
I am very intrigued to see how this turns out for a number of reasons. We obviously never got a clear picture of what happened in Wuhan, thanks to the deliberate efforts of Eddie and the Chinese Government. I'd love to get a more unfiltered look at ground zero, so I hope that this can give us all that without much red tape.
Black Gold - From Oscar-nominated director Darren Aronofsky’s Protozoa and Emmy® Award-winning Time Studios, this is a true-life conspiracy thriller about a decades-long campaign to trade our planet for profit.
The oil industry takes a lot of well deserved flack, but that is almost a deterrent for my interest here. That is to say, I think we all know that fossil fuels are obliterating our planet while a bunch of fat cats profit off the destruction. What can this tell us that we don't already know? Beats me, I like Aronofsky when he isn't making fucked up terrible movies like 'Mother!', though..
For Heaven’s Sake - Blends comedy and crime documentary formats for a unique take on uncovering the truth. The series follows the search for Harold Heaven, who mysteriously disappeared from his remote cabin in Ontario, Canada, in the winter of 1934.
This seems like a wikipedia page you stumble in like, the 5th domino search of a rabbit hole. I'm down!
The Real Criminal Minds - A true crime docu series, featuring a former real FBI profiler. The series will examine real cases, and real criminal behavior, illustrated by clips fans will remember from the fictional series.
I enjoy the actual show 'Criminal Minds', which makes me interested to see the real-life inspirations. I do love this title, though. Basically an inadvertent FUCK YOU to criminal minds. Posers.
Watergate - From MTV Entertainment Studios, this series will illuminate a moment in our history that parallels so much of what’s happening now.
To me, Watergate is just not that interesting anymore. Maybe thats because Trump would have %10000 gotten away with Watergate and the story would have been gone in a month. We're desensitized!
Sir Alex Ferguson: Never Give In - Tells the story of the legendary manager of Manchester United, and one of the most memorable figures in European football.
As someone who really doesn't know enough about pre-2000s footy, I'm very excited to watch this and do a little learning and wiki-diving.
Stories from the Beautiful Game - An original soccer documentary series produced by Pete Radovich, the award-winning coordinating producer of CBS Sports’ UEFA coverage. Paramount+ will release several soccer documentaries every year, starting later in 2021.
I'm all about this because soccer has had some incredibly outlandish and scandalous stories over the years, as well as incredibly inspirational ones.
CBS ALL ACCESS CRAP
They're going to continue the originals they made and rebrand them as Paramount+ originals. That includes Star Trek Discovery/Picard/Lower Decks, Stephen Colbert Presents Tooning Out the News, No Activity, The Good Fight and Why Women Kill.
To be honest, the only one of these I have seen is Star Trek Picard. It's no secret that their originals were not up to par compared to other streaming services like Netflix and Hulu, and I think that was an emphasis with Paramount+ as you'll see in a minute.
MUSIC
They have MTV, which seems to have a renewed focus with Paramount+. They're bringing back 'Behind the Music' and 'Yo, MTV Raps!' with both episodes from the vault and brand new episodes. I missed the mark for the latter, but I liked the latter and do a youtube dive every now and then.
They're also going to have 'Unplugged', which is a big plus for fans (myself included) with new episodes coming sporadically. Lastly, they're launching a new show
From Cradle to Stage - This new six-part, unscripted television series from Director Dave Grohl was inspired by his mother, Virginia Hanlon Grohl, and based on her critically-acclaimed book, From Cradle to Stage: Stories from the Mothers Who Rocked and Raised Rock Stars. The series is a dynamic personal exploration of the special relationship between successful musicians and their moms. Each episode features a famous performer and their mom as well as Dave and Virginia.
This seems like a very personal project for Grohl, who is an all-around great guy. He honestly has to be one of the most ubiquitously loved musicians in the rock world, right? Anyway, that personal aspect means he is probably really passionate about it which makes for a better product. I am also intrigued by the concept because I imagine there is a lot of fear and anxiety for parents of superstars.
KIDS & FAMILY
They have Nickelodeon's library, which means they're bringing Spongebob, Paw Patrol and apparently 70,000 episodes of television to Paramount+. They also announced some new originals/revivals:
Avatar - Nickelodeon’s new animation studio division dedicated entirely to creating content based on the wildly popular world of Avatar: The Last Airbender and The Legend of Korra. Led by the series’ original creators Mike DiMartino and Bryan Konietzko, in partnership with the Nickelodeon Animation Studio, Avatar Studios will produce for Paramount+ a wide-range of Avatar-inspired content, ranging from spinoffs and theatricals to short form.
This is the best news out of this whole bunch by far. Avatar is one of the best animated shows ever made. FULL STOP! And that all had to do with DiMartino and Konietzko having the room to cook and do what they want (Along with Clone Wars/The Mandalorian showrunner, Dave Filoni). ICYMI, Netflix made a deal to make a live-action Avatar series that original had them both attached to be showrunners, but they have since left due to creative differences. The inclusion of them on these shows is basically a killshot for that Netflix adaptation.
Dora the Explorer – A new live-action series based on the iconic character, designed for an older audience of kids 6-11 and their families.
Yea, sure I guess? I feel like it is easier for kids to digest in the animated format, but I'm not exactly a parent over here.
iCarly - A new chapter for the most successful kids’ sitcom of all time, where original cast members Miranda Cosgrove, Nathan Kress and Jerry Trainor join new friends for a look at these characters’ present-day lives, adventures and comedic mishaps.
This may be a shocker, but I was never a huge watcher of this show when I was younger. That said, I know for a fact that you can't do this without Jeanette McCurdy. I know she is essentially done with Nickelodeon, and for good reason.
Kamp Koral: SpongeBob’s Under Years - The first-ever spinoff of SpongeBob SquarePants, Kamp Koral is a CG animated original series that takes viewers back to when the iconic characters of Bikini Bottom met for the very first time, in a summer camp like no other.
The CGI Spongebob shit really freaks me out, but if the kids are watching it, why not.
Rugrats - An all-new series featuring Nick’s iconic babies, back together with the original voice cast in new CG animation.
Again, going away from traditional animation to CGI freaks me out. Especially for the Rugrats which are already kinda creepy-looking.
Star Trek: Prodigy - The first-ever Star Trek for the kids and family audience, combining the Nickelodeon sensibility with the action and adventure hallmarks of the Star Trek franchise.
I think that this is a good movie. The original Star Trek series' are basically just serial's with life lessons anyway, so why not just smooth it all out for a kid audience.
The Fairly OddParents – A live-action take on one of Nick’s longest running and most successful animated hits
No. Just fucking, no.
REALITY TV
They're going to have a library of over 5,000 episodes of Reality TV, which makes sense since MTV basically created the genre. Here is what they got coming both new and reprisedL
Big Brother Live Feeds - Offers an in-depth, exclusive pass to the show where fans have the opportunity to watch all the action inside the Big Brother house.
This is a very intriguing idea that I can only see ending very badly. EDIT: They've apparently been doing these before and I just hadn't seen heard of them before (not a Big Brother guy).
Dating Naked - The most vulnerable social experiment returns to bring dating back to its most honest, unguarded and naked form. Can these modern daters strip back their preconceived notions, carefully curated images AND their clothes to reveal their true selves and find love?
I was never a fan of this or any of the other naked shows. Definitly not because I look like a melting ice cream sandwich, though.
Ink Masters - The tattoo competition reality series where some of the nation’s top tattoo artists battle it out in various tattoo challenges that not only test the artists’ technical skills, but also their on-the-spot creativity for the title of Ink Master.
I actively dislike Dave Navarro but I do like Ink Masters. It is a crazy art that doesn't get enough respect from peopel that only think of celtic crosses, tramp stamps and Ben Affleck when tattoos come to mind.
Love Island on Paramount+ - An extension of the popular CBS reality series that takes subscribers beyond the boundaries of what’s shown in the broadcast with exclusive content and live visits to the Villa.
Love Island has an INSANE following and for good reason. It is wildly entertaining and gaining a much bigger following in the U.S. as the years have gone on.
Queen of the Universe - In a singing competition like no other, drag queens from all around the world compete to see who is Queen of the Universe. High heels, high octaves, high competition - this drag queen singing competition will blow your wig off. From Emmy® Award-winning production company, World of Wonder.
The world of drag is an incredibly entertaining one of pageantry, music, dance etc. Going to drag shows is obviously a little harder in this era, so this is a good idea to get some more of their content out in the world.
Road Rules - Back with a new roster of Road Warriors. These strangers will be abandoned in a far-flung location and stripped of their modern-day luxuries by boarding a restricted life in an RV, traveling from location to location. They will be guided by a set of clues, odd jobs and missions for money. If they last to the end of the trip, they walk away with the life changing prize.
I never got in to Road Rules, which was obviously outlived by it's spin-off. For fans of the show, I'm assuming this is welcome news, though.
RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars – The best of the best from the Emmy® Award-winning RuPaul’s Drag Race return to compete for $100,000 and a coveted spot in the Drag Race Hall of Fame. In each episode, legendary queens will battle it out until only one drag queen is crowned the winner.
Drag Race has been on for as long as it has for a reason. It has a rabid fan base that will always want more of this.
The Challenge: All Stars - Twenty-two of the most iconic, boldest, and fiercest Challenge All Stars from the original Real World and Road Rules have been selected to return for a second chance at the ultimate competition. All have history, but when relationships are the key to survival, will these legends be able to form new bonds or will their past lead to their demise? With $500,0000 and their legacies on the line, which of these All Stars will prove they are still the best of the best?
'll never get sick of this for as long as I live.
The Real World: Homecoming: New York - Almost 30 years later, the original “seven strangers” that paved the way for modern reality TV are moving back into the New York loft where it all began. Viewers will be reunited with the cast from the very first season of The Real World in a brand new multi-episode docuseries to find out, once again, what happens when they stop being polite… and start getting real. Series begins streaming onThursday, March 4th.
This is a cool idea, but also a bit of a nostalgia play. It also immediately makes me think of one of my favorite Chappelle skits.
COMEDY
Frasier - Frasier’s back and he’s more exactly the same than ever. Kelsey Grammer reprises his role as the Dr. Frasier Crane.
As an unapologetic Kelsey Grammer super-stan, I love this. We talked about it a bit on the last episode on LCB, but the but he is going to have to be a podcaster now, right?
Grease: The Rise of the Pink Ladies - with both classic and new songs, and a diverse cast, the series is a prequel to the unforgettable musical film, Grease, and tells the story of how Frenchy’s older sister, Jane, founded the Pink Ladies. The series, from Paramount Television Studios, is executive produced by Annabel Oakes (Atypical, Transparent), Marty Bowen (Twilight) and Erik Feig (La La Land).
I like Grease and really enjoyed Grease: Live, but I don't think I have a ton of interest for this. Although, Erik Feig has proved himself to be pretty good at this kind of thing.
Guilty Party - A dark comedy starring Kate Beckinsale as a discredited journalist who finds herself in over her head when she latches onto the story of a young mother sentenced to life in jail for murdering her husband – a crime she claims she didn’t commit.
I love Kate Beckinsale and I love dark comedy, what's not to love? The concept is meh, but I presume they're going to do something unique with it.
Inside Amy Schumer - The Peabody, Emmy® and Writers Guild Award-winning franchise returns with five specials starring Amy Schumer, one of the entertainment industry’s leading forces as a stand-up comedian, actress, writer, producer and director.
There was definitly a point in time where I found Schumer funny. That time is long gone, though. I remember she was accused of joke stealing on some of the original run. I don't know what came of that, but I assume that whatever she makes from now on will be painstakingly original for better or worse.
Reno 911! The Hunt For QAnon - A super-sized event based off the long-running hit, critically acclaimed Comedy Central series. Most recently, Reno 911! received two 2020 Emmy® Award nominations for Outstanding Short Form Comedy or Drama Series and for Outstanding Actress in A Short Form Comedy or Drama Series (Kerri Kenney-Silver). In 2021, the show is nominated for a Critics Choice Award.
I have fond memories of Reno 911 from it's first incarnation, but I have no interest in anything QAnon. If you're going to bring back something with Thomas Lenon, how about starting with THE STATE???
The Game - The popular BET sitcom returns with a mix of original cast and new players, and will offer a modern-day examination of Black culture through the prism of pro football.
The landscape of this shows premise has changed a lot since the original run of the show ended, so it will be cool to see everything revisited with a new lens.
The Harper House - An animated family comedy that follows an overconfident female head of a household as she struggles to regain a higher status for herself and for her family of oddballs after losing her job and moving from the rich side to the poor side of an Arkansas small town.
This seems a little live a vibe jacking of Schitt's Creek with more of a singular focus on a character instead of being split between a family.
The Weekly Show with Trevor Noah (Working Title) - Trevor Noah will star in and produce an initial six episode series looking at stories across the societal landscape and talk with the people behind the headlines: people you know; people you don’t know; and people you didn’t even know you didn’t know.
I think Noah is charming, but I just don't find him particularly funny. This might be because his run with the Daily Show was much more difficult than Stewart's thanks to the political landscape, but still.
Younger - Darren Star’s critically acclaimed smash-hit, Younger, follows Liza Miller (Sutton Foster), a talented editor navigating the highly competitive world of publishing while juggling the complications of mixing business with pleasure and facing the lie she created about her age to land her dream job.
I never got into, or even heard of, this show, but the final season will be airing on Paramount+. It has a had a great reception and is the longest airing show in TVLands history for what it's worth.
Untitled Beavis & Butt-head Movie - Emmy® Award-winning Mike Judge reimagines MTV’s seminal, Gen X-defining Beavis and Butt-Head who return for another movie adventure to kick-off the new series.
Mike Judge is a genius so I will instantly co-sign everything he ever does.
Workaholics Movie - made-for-streaming movie based off the popular long-running Comedy Central series starring Blake Anderson, Adam DeVine, Anders Holm and Kyle Newacheck.
The Workaholics gang have been doing their own thing along with a couple collective works, but it will be cool to see the gang get back together again.
SCRIPED DRAMAS
Criminal Minds – Top rated series in broadcast and streaming returns with a new scripted series that brings the team back together to investigate a single, fascinating case over 10 episodes.
Like I said before, I like Criminal Minds. It's relatively interesting True Crime slop.
Flashdance – A young woman struggles to make her mark in the ballet world while navigating romance, money, art, friendship, and how to love herself. Award-winning Mad Men writer Tracy McMillan is writing and executive producing the drama series which will pick up from where the story left off, but in present-day. True Blood’s Angela Robinson will direct and executive produce the series with Lynda Obst.
I was never a huge fan of the Flashdance movie, but having the Mad Men writer and True Blood director is certainly a value add.
Halo – Based on the iconic Xbox® franchise, Halo’s epic universe and cast of characters come to life in this new original drama series. In the new television adaptation, Halo will take place in the universe that first came to be in 2001, dramatizing an epic 26th-century conflict between humanity and an alien threat known as the Covenant. Halo will weave deeply drawn personal stories with action, adventure and a richly imagined vision of the future.
I have extremely high hopes for this series for the soul reason that I believe in Pablo Schreiber as a bona fide action star. For YEARS I have said that Halo would make an incredible live-action property if done right. Will this be that property? I don't know. But I sure hope so.
Land Man – Set in the proverbial boomtowns of West Texas, Land Man is a modern-day tale of fortune seeking in the world of oil rigs. The series is an upstairs/downstairs story of roughnecks and wildcat billionaires fueling a boom so big, it’s reshaping our climate, our economy and our geopolitics.
This is the first of 4 shows coming from one of my favorite writer/directors in the game and the KING of the Neo-Western genre, Taylor Sheridan. More than anyone else, he has an ironclad grip on the genre and proved he can make it work across a series with his phenomenal work on Yellowstone. Be prepared to binge all of them.
Mayor of Kingstown – Follows the McLusky family, power brokers in Kingstown, Michigan, where the business of incarceration is the only thriving industry. Tackling themes of systemic racism, corruption and inequality, the series provides a stark look at their attempt to bring order and justice to a town that has neither.
I love Sheridan just working his way through the parts of the country that don't get as much shine as the coasts. I'm curious to see what the vibe of this will be. By the way, did you know that the Barstool Sportsbook is live in Michigan?
Yellowstone Spinoff, 6666 (Working Title) – Founded when Comanches still ruled West Texas, no ranch in America is more steeped in the history of the West than the 6666. Still operating as it did two centuries before, and encompassing an entire county, the 6666 is where the rule of law and the laws of nature merge in a place where the most dangerous thing one does is the next thing… The 6666 is synonymous with the merciless endeavor to raise the finest horses and livestock in the world, and ultimately where world class cowboys are born and made.
Y:1883 – Follows the Dutton family as they embark on a journey west through the Great Plains toward the last bastion of untamed America. It is a stark retelling of Western expansion, and an intense study of one.
I really can't emphasize enough how you got to get on board the Yellowstone train now while you still can. It is a fucking incredible drama that only gets better as it goes. DO IT!
Love Story – Josh Schwartz and Stephanie Savage, the executive producers of Gossip Girl, The O.C. and Looking for Alaska, are bringing to Paramount+ a series based on the awardwinning perennial film, Love Story.
If you're a fan of pure romances, this will be for you. The original movie is basically the quintessential one for the genre, so if they can get even close to that level then it will be successful.
Star Trek: Strange New Worlds – The next installment of the popular Star Trek franchise is based on the years Captain Christopher Pike manned the helm of the U.S.S. Enterprise. The series will follow Captain Pike, Science Officer Spock and Number One in the decade before Captain Kirk boarded the U.S.S. Enterprise.
Star Trek is a franchise where I believe the more, the merrier. AS long as there is either a big enough budget to show off the universe or an interesting enough storyline to do like with DS9.
The Italian Job – When the grandchildren of the legendary Charlie Croker inherit his old safety deposit box, the quest for the infamous Italian bullion is reignited. The series, from Paramount Television Studios, is executive produced and written by Matt Wheeler (Hawaii Five-0), and produced by Donald De Line.
I really love both Italian Job movies, but I don't know how it works as a series? But I also immediately think of how much I like Money Heist so why not!
The Man Who Fell To Earth – Starring Oscar-nominee and BAFTA-winner Chiwetel Ejiofor, is based on the Walter Tevis novel of the same name and the iconic film starring David Bowie. The series will follow a new alien character who arrives on Earth at a turning point in human evolution, and must confront his own past to determine our future.
I'm a big Ejofor guy and really want to get the bad taste that 'Locked In' left in my mouth. I never read the book but I am a fan of the Bowie movie, so I'll have a tentative excitement for this.
The Offer – A scripted limited event series from Paramount Television Studios, based on Oscar-winning producer Al Ruddy’s extraordinary, never-revealed experiences of making The Godfather. The 10-episode event series is written and executive produced by Michael Tolkin (Escape at Dannemora, The Player). Ruddy will also serve as executive producer, alongside showrunner Nikki Toscano (Hunters), and Emmy® Award-winning producer Leslie Greif (Hatfields & McCoys).
I'm all for more BTS content based on one of the greatest movies ever made.This crew is also stacked, by the way. Escape at Dannemora and Hatfields & McCoys both slapped, and Hunters was also very cool.
The Parallax View – A scripted series from Paramount Television Studios, based on the iconic film. The series will be executive produced by Paula Wagner.
'Paralax View' was one of Warren Beatty's best roles and the movie is awesome, but the movie kind of gets overshadowed by Pakula's other work, 'All The President's Men'. I think the general concept lends itself well to a series, so we'll see.
MOVIES
Certain Paramount movies are going to be put on streaming 30-45 days after their theatrical release. This includes:
Mission: Impossible 7
A Quiet Place Part II, Snake Eyes, Top Gun: Maverick, Sonic the Hedgehog 2, Transformers 7, Dungeons and Dragons and Scream.
As part of their deal with EPIX, they're also going to had an expanded library including the James Bond and Hunger Games Franchise, The Adams Family, The Avengers and 2,500 more movies. New MGM movies will also come to Paramount+ after a pay window on EPIX, including Creed III, No Time to Die, and House of Gucci.
They also noted that they're going to expand more into original movies with the previously announced Paranormal Activity and Pet Sematary movies + more.
This is great for us, because since there are obviously still theater anxieties. If you feel comfortable going to the movies, I recommend doing so especially for movies like MI7 and Top Gun. But for those of you that don't, you can still watch in the comfort of your own home.
Well, THATS IT. I think they realized that despite being ahead of the curve to the streaming game, they needed a serious fucking change and they've done it. Lets see if it works out and they can regain some market share in the streaming world.
