Browns-Giants: The Revenge Game To End All Revenge Games
Colt McCoy. Freddie Kitchens. Jabril Peppers. Kevin Zeitler. Four innocent young men wronged by the dastardly National Football League franchise known as the Cleveland Browns. Were they paid millions of dollars by this evil organization that ultimately resulted in a bunch of losing seasons for the good people of Cleveland? Of course. But having those Browns say you are not good enough to work for them is about as unshakable stench on a football players resume, like the stink palm from Mallrats.
Of course we can't forget Baker Mayfield taking shots at Daniel Jones and Giants fans for no reason at all last year.
A lesser reported story that we will no doubt here a zillion times tonight is how Kevin Stefanski beat out Joe Judge for a QB spot on their freshman football team.
Oh yeah, and some guy named Odell Beckham Jr. got traded to the Browns with Olivier Vernon too. Can't forget that tidbit that may be mentioned once or twice.
For Big Blue to cash in some of that sweet sweet vengeance, they need Patrick Graham to flummox Baker like he did Mr. Unliiiiiiimited except with the twist of having to contain two stud running backs instead of a banged up Chris Carson (not having to deal with two star receivers is nice though). Colt McCoy has to once again ride the Wayne Train and aim small miss small when he fires. Freddie Kitchens may not have had much success as a head coach but he was a helllllll of an interim offensive coordinator for an undersized Big XII QB legend, which last I checked is exactly who he is calling a game for tonight.
Special teams simply needs to stop being a smoldering garbage fire while also maybe mixing in a good play or two along with a funky trick play if Coach Judge is feeling saucy.
If the Giants don't win tonight, the term Revenge Game must be erased from the English language forever simply because of the amount of crazy shit that had to happen that resulted in Freddie Kitchens calling the plays against the Browns in a primetime game between these two teams.. Luckily the advanced analytics love us.
As do the Football Gods.
As do I.
Now let's fuck around and reclaim our spot atop the NFC East. Cue the goddamn Eli SNFace for the game Carrie Underwood has been waiting all day for!!!