A Stoolie Made A Barstool Cyber Monday Song And It's A Fucking BANGER

I'll fully admit that when I clicked on this link, I was extremely skeptical of what my ear drums were about to be subjected to. But that was, to borrow a phrase, actually good! Some people will say that simply sampling the musical stylings of William Martin Joel essentially can make every song sound like a smash hit. But seamlessly fitting in lyrics of the chaos from this weekend along with the boatload of professionals idiots on this pirate ship was top notch and anybody that disagrees must make a better song before I take their criticism seriously.

Am I a bit biased because I work at Barstool, have been a Stoolie forever, and don't want to get Ethered on the Dave Portnoy Show for not promoting Cyber Monday enough? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe fuck yourself. But there is no denying that Boom Roasted 86 dropped the greatest Barstool Cyber Monday song in the history of Barstool Cyber Monday songs.

Speaking of Barstool Cyber Monday, the Barstool Cyber Monday telethon is back this year. So buy some gear for yourself or for others this holiday season for 20% off for the rest of the day then get a number to talk to some of the mamalukes that work here.

Need suggestions on what to buy at the Barstool Store? Here are a couple of completely random selections that I picked with my eyes closed.