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A Sneak Peek At What Her Night Looks Like When She Says She's "Going Out With The Girls"

Little video that might be helpful for all the younger dudes out there. The ones who are still a little insecure, who hear "going out" and "girl's night, no boyfriends allowed" and actually get nervous, start dreaming up every possibility until your mind eventually settles on a scenario involving like 2 hulking european male gymnasts and a flying sex trapeze, so by the time she gets home you've already started a fight over text by asking her how the fucking circus was. Fellas, calm down. Listen to me: Don't sweat it. This is what she's doing. This video.  I promise. Well I don't promise but it's very likely. She's either girl #1 who is on another planet helping out her friends with their boy problems, or she's #2 — and even if she was conscious enough to hear her friend list the reasons you're not good enough, the concussion from the fall would have wiped it out. All you really need to worry about is if you're cleaning puke out of the bed or bathroom tomorrow. 

Best of all, every dude over like 28 can confirm: one day soon, you'll hear the words "girls night" and not recognize this person you are now. This guy, this older you,  won't even hear the rest of the sentence, you'll be blacked out with a happiness and joy you thought was dead forever inside you, as you mentally plan your 3-4 hours of free time and calculate the optimal time split to maximize # of games in your Madden season with how many times you can masturbate. 

She could show up at 3 PM the next day saying she got a flat tire and her phone died so she crashed with a girlfriend you never met or heard mentioned ever. Maybe you'll ask her if she got that XXL fraternity sweatshirt from her too but honestly why mess up a good thing when you're still high on the 8 hours of undisturbed Call of Duty.