Mets First Round Draft Pick Pete Crow-Armstrong Once Hit A Home Run Over A Mountain, Is The Son Of The Mom From Little Big League, And Is Pretty Much Already A Hall Of Famer

Look, I don't know much about the MLB Draft and probably neither do you since amateur baseball doesn't have nearly the following of high school/college football or hoops. Shit, if you want to be honest about it, nobody really knows anything about any drafts considering how poorly teams consistently do in them and how many old takes get exposed every single year.

That being said, Pete Crow-Armstrong is a guaranteed unanimous first ballot Hall of Famer based on my advanced metrics, sabermetrics, analytics, and about 10 other words that end in "ics".

- First and foremost, his name is Pete Crow-Armstrong. PCA if you're nasty. When Mets fans hear the name Pete, this is the guy they think of:

Leading the league in home runs during your first season on your way to NL Rookie Of The Year is good, right? BIIIIG check on Pete's first name.

Next up is Crow, which I love as a diehard bird guy. I don't know if The Zoo will still be a thing by the time Pete makes it to Flushing, but the shirts pretty much print themselves. Lunatic Mets fans cawing from the stands as Pete repels down from the top of Citi Field before every at bat seems like it was written in the stars. 

Finally we have Armstrong, which is the perfect name for a centerfielder that's been praised for his defense.

Honestly, I'm not sure if Pete is a magician because he is slick with the glove or is a master of illusion like Gob Bluth. But I fucking love him no matter which is the correct answer.

- When scouting a player, you have to look into his background. Well Pete's mom was the mom from Little Big League which tells me he not only has the pedigree of a Major Leaguer but also a support system with experience transitioning a kid to the Bigs.

- If a great family background like that wasn't enough for you, Pete is also coming from a goddamn professional baseball factory.

The only way I could feel more confident in Pete Crow-Armstrong's background is if he was the son of Tom Emanski and graduated from the Tom Emanski school with honors

- All Mets fans worry how a player will deal with the big city. But I think it's safe to say that PCA will have no problem adjusting to life in Flushing or whatever shitty Wilpon still owns the team when he hits the Majors.

Not only that, but Pete seems like a legitimately good person with a great soul

Oh yeah and he literally hit a ball over a fucking mountain

Eat your heart out Uncle Rico.

Final Grade: 100/80. I don't know or care if you are allowed to grade a baseball player higher than 80 because I hate any grading system that doesn't use a factor of 10. I love Pete Crow-Armstrong with all my heart and cannot wait to see which veteran, likely with CAA ties, Brodie trades him for this season.

Ohhhhhh shiiiiiiiiiiit. The Mets may actually not be trading their pick this year. We just may be growing something in Queens. Considering the team's outright refusal to address the most important position in the outfield for years, I think its safe to say the centerfield job is Pete's for whenever he wants it.