Tinder Winner Is Looking For A Sperm Donor If Anyone's Interested

Talk about amateur hour.  Hey pal, you’re not even going to inquire how much your boys are worth?  Or how they’re going to collect the seed?  There are people who would kill for this kind of easy money and this guy throws away the job offer without even knowing the salary or benefits.  Screw the money, the smart play is to tell Rachelle if she wants it then come and get it.  Just have to make sure it’s her and not the (probably) butch Aunt coming to collect the goods.

Little known secret about the kid:  Back in the degenerate days of poker where we’d do anything for a buck I actually qualified for sperm donation.   Yes, I agree with what you’re thinking, but on paper we don’t look that bad.  6’3, college “athlete” with a diploma, white.  A perfect breeder for anyone lazy enough to not have a 2-minute conversation with me.  And no, I didn’t go through with it.  Not cause I didn’t want to have 500 kids hit me up in 20 years like Vince Vaughn in Delivery Man (not a bad flick), but because I legitimately don’t think the boys can swim anymore.  The amount of time an overheated laptop has been on my dick the inside of my balls resemble Chernobyl by now.   That and I got stage fright in the “delivery room” and made an absolute beeline for the exit.  Sad but true.

h/t Timbo