You're Damn Right I'm Winning This N64 By Doing The Greatest Chewbacca Roar Of All-Time

SOLD!  I mean, if it were real (since been taken down on Craigslist).  It was obviously a very well done April Fool’s joke with a number going to one of his buddy’s voicemails.  Only a certified evil genius would make some poor schlub go through a thousand Chewbacca roars to get to a business message he desperately needs.  Regardless, I had the pipes warmed up to take down the title and Goldeneye till I die:

Ladies, line up.  Almost too hot to handle.  That sounds like either cat being castrated or a mating call for queer giraffes.  Possibly somehow both.

Need to take lessons off the Tourettes Guy’s garbage disposal.  Either say that thing is Chewy to a T or else you’re all grounded.

PS  – The well has dried up for the Barstool Philly Mario Kart Challenge Amongst Men.  Don’t want, NEED action.  All who wish to surrender their souls in Bowser’s Castle, apply here.