Manhunt Underway In England For Guy Who Test Drove A Fleshlight In A Sex Shop Which Is Somehow Illegal?

(Source)  Police are hunting a man who was allegedly caught on a sex shop’s CCTV testing out an artificial vagina. The man pulled down his pants and tried out a ‘fleshlight’, a best-selling sex toydisguised as a torch, it is claimed. Stunned staff at Simply Pleasure in Exeter, Devon, reported the incident to police who are treating it as indecent exposure.

A member of staff refused to comment but confirmed the suspect used a piece of equipment called a ‘fleshlight’ during his alleged lewd act. The incident happened on January 29 but details have only just been released by police. A Devon and Cornwall Police spokesman said: “The man in question is believed to have entered the store and spoken to staff before going upstairs where he selected a product and used it whilst alone in the room. “He was disturbed by a member of staff and then left the store without making a purchase. “We have released CCTV pictures of a man we would like to speak to in connection with an act of public indecency at an Exeter shop. “We are appealing to anyone who recognises the man pictured to contact us.” Staff declined to comment at the store.

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So what exactly are the store rules on fleshlights? I mean everyone knows you can test drive a car, but this isn’t exactly a car. And everyone knows the old rule “if you break it you buy it”, but he didn’t really break anything, I assume the flesh-light is still fully operational. And this whole “indecent exposure” thing is bullshit, it’s a sex shop for christ sakes. So where exactly does that leave us? I feel like if you don’t jizz you shouldn’t be manhunted. Does it change the fact that it seemed like he was attempting to jizz but was interrupted before he could do so? Is attempted ejaculation a lesser level crime on the cum crime scale? Someone who went to law school fill us in here. I read this article, I see the police are manhunting a man for putting his dick in something that was made for dicks to be put in to, and I can’t help but think there is a level of gray here. Can’t be as black and white as this article is making it seem. It’s not like he killed a person, but it’s also not like a jaywalking.

Judge Big Cat Ruling – You know how when you walk through a department store they have free samples. Some lady impeding where you walk by spraying cologne in your face? A jar of hand cream that says “SAMPLE” on it that everyone can use. Well that’s what a sex shop should do. Just put out a SAMPLE fleshlight on the counter. If you want to put your dick in it, go for it, but you know everyone else has done the same. Then, once you do that, you find this guy and you make him clean the SAMPLE fleshlight every day for a month. Boom, done, I think I just solved all of the world’s problems.