Next Up On The List of 2020: Cannibal Rats

First came the coronavirus. Then came the murder hornets. 1.5 million cicadas are coming out of the ground after a 17 year hiatus. Oh, and Kobe died. It's only May.....what else can go wrong in 2020?

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you: cannibal rats.

Due to lockdown restrictions and a significant drop in the levels of garbage from places like restaurants, rats have been forced to eat their own babies or take bolder risks in searching open environments for food.

A recent update from the Centers of Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) warned US cities may discover “unusual or aggressive rodent behavior” as a result of their food shortages:

Community-wide closures have led to a decrease in food available to rodents, especially in dense commercial areas. Some jurisdictions have reported an increase in rodent activity as rodents search for new sources of food

I feel like the universe is trying to tell us something here. Maybe 2020 years was simply enough time on God's green earth for the human race. Because it seems like whoever is running this thing is going to keep sending us stuff until we finally give in. And didn't rats start the first plague? Could you imagine if we had to fight off the coronavirus AND the black death right now? That'd be an unfortunate turn of events. But as of now, all we're dealing with is a growing case of cannibal rats.

Do I care that rats are eating other rats? No, I personally do not. It's the age old question of would you rather have 100 tiny hungry rats or 10 huge full-bellied rats. Doesn't really matter to me. Because rats stay in their dark little alleys and in dumps like New York City. But what I am now concerned about is the fact that these rats are "taking bolder risks in searching open environments for food". Uhhhh, what? Does that mean they're coming into restauraunts? Into grocery stores? Walking down the street in broad daylight?

I get you're upset, rats, I really do. When I get hungry, I do unreasonable things as well. Desperate times call for desperate measures. I couldn't imagine going through all these changes and cancellations of the corona on an empty stomach. But rats just coming out in the open and displaying "agressive rodent behavior" is too much for the world right now. Kill your babies all you want. Eat eachother. Just please, PLEASE, do it in the comfort of your own dumpster. We don't have time for a rat rebellion right now.