Surviving Barstool | New Episodes Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday 8PM ETTUNE IN

Nobody Has Ever Wanted To Kick Somebody's Ass Harder Than This Goose

This goose was clearly waiting for this lady to waltz her way into work the same way she does every single day--wearing that Canada Goose looking jacket. And this specific goose has had enough of it. She's sick and tired of seeing her species being used to keep all these basic ass betches warm. Maybe if they were keeping warriors warm through some treacherous conditions in the winter wilderness, she'd understand. But just so Becky can keep up with the latest trends as she waits in line at Starbucks every morning? Not on her watch. This is war now. 

Gonna be tough to afford to buy another jacket when you can't even show up to work anymore. Might be time to just switch over to a hoodie or something. It won't look as good for Instagram but at least you won't have to constantly be looking over your shoulder for a goose attack anymore. 

Sidenote: How about this knight in shining armor? Almost hit her with his car and then just ran away when the goose hopped in the car. He had to know right away when he saw that a camera caught this whole situation that he wasn't coming out of this one unscathed. 

@BarstoolJordie