NOT BREAKING: ESPN And NFL Network Won't Allow Their Reporters To Spoil Picks Before They Are Made During The NFL Draft

I hate to give that fuckbag Big Rona credit for anything, but I think he may have just made the NFL Draft watchable again. Don't get it twisted, all of us are going to watch every stupid pick of this draft with ratings that will probably rival the Super Bowl because nothing else is on. But the draft actually being filled with suspense and intrigue instead of feeling like its stuck 10 minutes behind the real world on DVR will actually be fun for once now if ESPN and NFL Network throw a muzzle on the Adam Schefters and Ian Rapoports of the world along with no cameras picking up players talking on their phone right before Roger Goodell says their name. Save me the "You know you can watch the draft without going on Twitter" criticisms too because that's about the same as watching the draft without breathing for me.

The only obvious flaw with this entire plan is that only ESPN and NFL Network employees are being held to this standard, which means any #insider that isn't getting their paychecks signed by either of those evil organizations can tweet whatever they want. However, while that would suck since everyone's timeline would become flooded with whoever was tweeting those leaks and GMs like Dave Gettleman would throw their computer out the window because they thought someone hacked their system, it would be great to see Schefty or Rapsheet go Woj on the rulebook by finding new ways to spoil picks without actually spoiling them, which was some of the best entertainment a draft has ever provided this side of ugly suits and awkward handshake hugs between commissioners and players.

These last four were my favorite because Woj used the word "laser" then seemed like he was getting super horny #WojAfterDark