I Hope To Goodness I'm This Athletic Next Year, Nevermind In 50 Years

I watched this video of this old man bowling more times than I'd admit to the FBI. Why? Because I am infinitely jealous. At the very disgusting age of 31 (Honestly, 31 is such a shitty age. Not young enough to be stupid, not old enough to be wise. Just a pile of shit age) every day I feel myself getting less and less athletic. I wake up with achey bones and muscles. If I sleep with my weight shifted a half a centimeter one way, my back feels like an accordion for the next week. I used to be able to run like the wind blows, now if the wind blows my knees hurt for days. That's no joke, actually. I used to be a decent runner and I shredded my knees and never got them fixed and now I just live in a world of pain. 

Recently I've been going to the gym. Part of my whole "don't be a fucking asshole in 2020" plan. Eat better, workout more, drink less, be happier. In fact, I had my first alcohol of January yesterday. It was a delight. I went 49/50 days going back to December 20th, including all of January, without drinking. Benefits? I am actually not sure. I didn't lose weight, but that's probably because I weigh as much as a whale shit, so that was to be expected. Mostly I just woke up with fewer headaches and stomach aches, sent fewer regrettable texts at 2am, and developed better eating and workout habits. That's what I found are the real benefits to not drinking, you just find other things to do instead. 

Will it last for me? If history is any indication, probably not. As Sam Bozo once said, "drinking is more fun than not drinking". And you really can't put a price on having fun, drinking beers, and living your life to the fullest. That's where the balance has to come in, I am working on figuring out how I can be both healthy *and* drink/have fun. My brain generally works where I have to go all in on one thing and totally stop doing another. Now comes phase 2- being healthy but also getting black out drunk and sending regrettable texts at 2am. That's the goal.

So what does that have to do with the old man bowling at the top? I don't know. I just didn't want to post an IG video and write 3 sentences like "GOOOOO OLD MAN!!! WOW! WHAT A BOWLER!". I generally try to put more effort into blogs than that, even when I'm just posting smokeshows or IG models.

So hey. Good luck to everyone in their fitness and life goals. May we all be blessed with the same athleticism as that old man bowler when we are too old to remember our own name. Gosh bless.