Tourists Get Popped For Pooping In A Sacred Temple In Machu Picchu
(SOURCE)
Six tourists were busted in Peru for allegedly defecating in a sacred temple at Machu Picchu, authorities said.
The group was arrested on Sunday after park rangers and police found them inside the Temple of the Sun, which is off-limits to visitors of the Inca citadel, Agence France-Press reported.
“The six tourists are being detained and investigated by the public ministry for the alleged crime against cultural heritage,” Cusco regional police chief Wilbert Leyva said, according to the report.
A few thoughts popped into my head when this story came across my timeline this morning. First one is from the comment section’s hay day. There was a commenter (I forget his name, someone please refresh my memory in the current day comment section, thanks) who would go to his local golf course every week or two and poop in the hole of the 8th green. Would just bend over and drop a rat right in the cup, knowing some poor soul would have to clean it out the next morning.
Is that an asshole move? Undoubtedly. Is it funny to read in the comment section of your favorite website when procrastinating in your cube, trying to curb your insatiable appetite to murder your boss? Of course it is.
It also gots me to thinking… who in the fuck is arresting these guys? Look at this picture and tell me how and where you’re supposed to drop a rat when nature calls?
Not like there are a bunch of porto johns handy if you are walking along all nimbly bimbly and get a case of the bubble guts. There might just be no other alternative than to just bend over and drop a rat in the Temple of the Sun. This tourist group probably had bad shellfish or something the night before. Can you really incriminate people when they have no choice but to drop a rat in the corner of ancient ruins? Def shouldn’t be able to. Shame on those park rangers. Guar-an-fucking-tee they’ve also been in a similar position before. Everyone has. And that brings me to my next thought…
…like 5 years ago I passed out at a buddy’s apartment in the west loop. He lived in a sick high rise with an awesome roof deck, pool, blah blah blah. We got shitfaced the night before and made the ill-advised decision to order Sarpino’s at like 3am. The next morning I woke up and instead of calling an uber to go home to Ukrainian Village, I hopped on a Divvy bike. It was about a 15 minute bike ride home, but 3-4 mins into the trip I got that all too familiar feeling. Every second that passed it got worse. I got on to Chicago Avenue heading west and knew I wasn’t going to make it home. It was either drop a rat in my pants with a mile or so left to ride, or find an alley at 9am in broad daylight.
Obviously I picked option B. I won’t go into detail on the rest of the story because you can use your imagination, but the moral of the story is this: when ya gotta go, ya gotta go. Doesn’t matter if you’re in a sacred temple or riding a bike home after eating shitty $10 pizza at 10am. Hopefully Peru feels the same way.