Matt Rhule Is Reportedly Finalizing A Deal To Become The Panthers Head Coach Before Even Meeting With The Giants

What the fuck just happened?!? I was happily making my 2 hour commute to the city to pump out some content at Barstool HQ today before Petey Thamel dripped a proverbial nuke on my head and the heads of millions of other Giants fans out of the goddamn blue.

All I have heard the last few weeks is how much the Giants loved Matt Rhule and how much Rhule loved the Giants dating back to when he was an assistant with the team and growing up in New York. The Giants even changed the location of today’s meeting from Baylor to the Meadowlands, which I thought meant the Giants would do whatever they could to make sure Rhule didn’t leave Metlife without a deal. It didn’t matter if he got full autonomy on naming his staff, 100% royalties on Giants smocks, or the right to catapult Dave Gettleman and his four computer folks directly into the sun  It seemed like Rhule was one of the people that still believed in the Giants Way, even if that saying has slowly eroded into a shitload of losses and embarrassing moments for a once proud franchise. 

Instead Rhule took a job with a team that has a new owner and an injured franchise QB that may be on the move over even taking an interview with one of the cornerstone franchises of the NFL because they were willing to hire that John Brenkus dude from ESPN or some shit.

If that’s not an indictment of how much Big Blue has sunk in peoples' eyes, I don’t know what is. 

At least things can’t get worse.

God fucking dammit. Get me former truck driver and forever common man Wink Martindale along with his pal Joe Brady from LSU this instant to bring this franchise back to its defensive glory days and transform Danny Dimes into a dual force that the NFL has never seen. But not before we slander the fuck out of Matt Rhule before his introductory press conference for being unevolved enough to not embrace new age football or spitting on the ground like a human.

OVER-RATED (clap clap, clap clap clap).

Maybe, just maybe Matt Rhule didn't turn down the Giants without even giving them a meeting because of their buffoon GM or slipping ownership. But maybe he knows something we don't…