Does This Look Like The Face Of A Man Arrested For Having Sex With A Stuffed Animal In Target?

ST. PETERSBURG, Fla. – A Florida man was arrested Tuesday after being caught have sex with a stuffed animal inside Target.

Witnesses told police they saw Cody Meader, 20, take a large Olaf from “Frozen” off the store shelves at a St. Petersburg location and begin to “dry hump” the toy.

The police report claims Meader ejaculated on the Olaf doll and put it back on the shelf before he “selected a large unicorn stuffed animal” and began to have sex with that object as well.

Meader was taken into custody while in the store and admitted to doing “stupid stuff.” He was arrested and charged with criminal mischief.

I am sure the internet is going to have a field day with this guy. Not me. We’ve all been this guy. Well maybe not actually this guy. I’ve never tried to have sex with a stuffed animal in a department store. Having said that…it’s “cuffing szn”. Go on instagram for one second and you’ll see all your friends posting pics with the person they were hooking up with in September as the summer wound down and now they’re in a relationship. They’re going apple picking. They’re doing pumpkin carving. They’re posting cutesy pictures in flannel and matching themed halloween costumes to the party that make you sick because fuck that, but at the same time it makes you feel very very alone. Deep down you’d love to be walking into the party as The Man In The Big Yellow Hat with a slutty curious George on your arm. That’d make you feel good and accepted. Confident. Everyone wants some loving through the holidays. And also…you’re horny.

This guy probably decided to do some retail therapy to make himself feel better. Walked into Target. Went passed the halloween costumes and saw a slutty Olaf costume

Got a little horny, walked down the toy aisle and locked eyes with an Olaf doll

He’s a frozen snowman, but his eyes are warm and inviting. Look how cute! He touches him. Oh man he’s a soft plush toy. Then all of a sudden…his pants are off and when the police get there he admits to “doing stupid stuff”. Like I said, it happens. Not to me. Not to you. You probably just end up with a guy or girl you secretly hate. This guy, he risked it all for a stuffed disney character he thought he could love.