Kyle Schwarber Hit On Some Hot Ladies Tonight In The Bleachers

Majestic blast into the night. One for the ages. One you tell your kids about down the road but most notably because your Aunt Nancy almost got murdered in the back row.

But that’s Cubs fans for you. When you think you’re down and out after getting swept by the NAtionals and then getting dragged by the Brewers and scoring 0 runs, Kyle Schwarber comes running back into your life witha . 412 foot blast. Fucking lazer beam off your shoulder pinned up against the back wall like it’s 3am at Beaumonts and you’re making out with some random piece of strange ass. It feels good. Weird. But good. So you keep going with it which brings me back to my original point. Majestic blast into the night.