Drew Rosenhaus Tries to Explain Antonio Brown's No-Show is Not a Problem

“We’ve worked very closely with the Raiders. Annd … we will continue to work very closely with the Raiders. I’m not sure that we agree that we’ve exhausted all the options, as Mike Mayock said. But there’s no doubt it’s still an ongoing process. We are continuing to work with the team and the league and the union to come up with a solution but we haven’t figured it out yet.

“To say that AB is upset about the decision to not let him wear his helmet is accurate. We’re still processing it and figuring it out. I wouldn’t make too much about him not being there today.” – Drew Rosenhaus

I first found out about Mike Mayock going in front of reporters to talk about Antonio Brown’s continued No-Show from Clem’s blog post about it.

And like him and no doubt you, my first reaction was how Mayock and Jon Gruden must be hating their career decisions right now. Mayock was the senior guy at NFL Network, working for the league in the one job in America where you never have to be right: NFL draft analyst. Where no one ever checks your math. Your hot takes about a prospect in 2015 will long be forgotten when he’s released before the end of his rookie deal. All that’s required of the job is to be able to burp the alphabet with some coherence about the future of a 21 year old football player, Not to predict the future. Gruden had the sweetest job in broadcasting. He just had to describe replays and play the character of Coach Gruden and tape a dozen or so quarterback interviews every week while faking enthusiasm.

The two of them must’ve been printing money. They flew first class, stayed in the best hotel rooms and hand interns with Bachelor’s in Journalism fetching them coffee for no pay. It was a great life for both of them. And now they find themselves toiling away in the no-win pressure cooker that is actually addressing actual problems every day and having to solve them. Where they no longer have the luxury of opinion; they’re expected to get results. NFL Network Mayock and ESPN Gruden would’ve had a field day turning this Antonio Brown raw material into content. Now we all can see it’s their waking nightmare.

But is anyone considering what this is like for Drew Rosenhaus. Yes, I’m not going to lose a lot of bodily fluid weeping for a man who sleeps every night on a giant pile of agent’s percentage and billable hours. But Mayock and Gruden are also rich. And none of these guys signed on for this. I have to believe Rosenhaus got into this business because there was a lot of money to be made negotiating deals for kids who were touched on the forehead by the athletic gods, representing their interests against the titans of industry. I’m sure and all agents see a certain nobility in taking the side of the kid who grew up poor against the lucky spermers who own pro teams, networks and shoe companies.

But part of his job is to humiliate himself on TV. Making ridiculous statements to defend his lunatic manchild of a client and say things Rosenhaus himself can’t possibly believe. I mean, imagine having to look into a camera and tell the public not to read anything into your $50 million client not showing up to work and having to make it sound convincing. How long do you think an associate at Rosenhaus’ firm would last if she refused to come into the office until they gave her a chair that fits her ass to her liking? Her diplomas, coffee mug and running shoes she leaves in the office for taking walks at lunch would be in the incinerator before 9:30.

So while I’m not crying for Rosenhaus because this is his job, I just want to acknowledge that there are more victims of Mr. Big Chest’s shenanigans than just Mayock. But at least the rest of us outside of Oakland and everyone at “Hard Knocks” come out of this winners.

At least Brown himself is grateful. So that’s something, I guess.