AJ Green Is Out To Start The Year So Ochocinco Is Offering To Play For The Bengals For The Hefty Price Of A McDonald's Coupon Book

You know what? Let’s get weird. Ochocinco, I got a spare room, you can even crash here. I don’t even like the Bengals but I want this to happen. It’s like when the Reds got Yasiel Puig. I don’t care about the Reds, but Puig in the city is a must-have. Having Ochocinco at training camp is a must-have.

Why he exactly wants the McDonald’s in Covington I have no idea. That’s a bizarre choice. You don’t want to keep going back and forth over the river. If you live in Cincinnati or if you’ve lived in Cincinnati you know this. You stay on the 71 corridor and get the coupon book for the one in Kenwood.

AJ Green is expected to miss the start of the year

At least he’s missing games in the start of the year so fantasy owners don’t have to play the AJ Green sit/start game during the playoff push. But, with him out and John Ross banged up the Bengals need someone else to run with Tyler Boyd.

Plus, I need to see what Ochocinco would look like on this McDonald’s diet. I assume he’d look a bit like the guy in Varsity Blues after the night at the strip club. But, if he can run around and make a squad on a McDonald’s stomach he might be the best athlete of all time. Not to mention Mike Brown is known for being cheap and this is as cheap of a deal as it comes.

So do the right thing and imagine what he can come up with now that he can legally dance