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Anyone Who Eats The New 'Cheez-It-Box-Wine' Combo Snack Should Be Wiped Off The Face Of The Earth

Source - Sure, you could enjoy a classic pairing of fine artisinal cheese and wine at a picnic or party, but where’s the irony in that?

For all you tongue-in-cheek winos out there, Kellogg and boxed wine brand House Wine have teamed up to bring you the ultimate creation of convenience and guilty pleasure: the Original Cheez-It and red House Wine combo box.

The vino is a balanced 50/50 blend of Cabernet Sauvignon and Merlot, and serves a generous 20 pours — so do bring a friend! The 98-year-old Cheez-It brand says they were inspired by social media, where folks “have already been participating in pairing wine with Cheez-It flavors for years,” their marketing director Jeff Delonis tells CNN Business. “So we’re excited to deliver on that specific consumer trend.”

 

Look, I have a confession to make…I don't believe my headline. I tried convincing myself that you'd be white trash if you eat the 'Cheez-It-Box-Wine' combo snack because I thought I was above it, but I can't in good consciousness stand by that statement.  The only reason I said you'd be trash in the first place is because I wanted to throw people off my trail. I didn't want anyone knowing how excited I was to sit on my couch, get blacked out drunk on Cheez-It's, and responsibly sip a delicious 50/50 blend of Cabernet Sauvignon and Merlot. Twenty-five dollars is a bit much, but I get it- you're paying for the convenience. You can now destroy your body in one place rather than in multiple locations.

 

Will this become a mainstay of the Cheez-It brand? Of course not, but it's a brilliant way to get people talking about Cheez-It's, and and even brilliant-er way to get people to post about the product online. That's the whole reason you buy it anyways- so that people can see you're eating it. Besides, it may not actually be (taste) that bad. Sometimes it's the weirdest food combos that work. For example, my current favorite combo is Kit Kats, blue Gatorade, sunflower seeds, and vanilla ice cream. Sue me. The best part of the whole thing is that they allegedly have a "limited supply" so they're going to sell out fast. I may buy one and keep it as a collector's item. Who knows? I'm all in on Cheez-Its and wine.