You're Not A True American Unless You Wish Alex Morgan A Happy 30th Birthday Today Before We Kick England's Ass

Hey, guys and gals. Just giving every single one of you a heads up. It’s our queens birthday today. Our American soccer queen that is – Alex Morgan. And it’s a special one. She turns 30. You only turn 30  and kick England’s ass in the World Cup semifinals once so we might as well make it a special one and all wish her a happy birthday.

Listen, she’s been arrogant by the English media over the last couple days. She’s been called out. Sure, people forget that she’s playing injured this tournament after scoring 5 goals and dancing all over Thailand. Something tells me she’s due for an important goal today. Hope she scores and breaks out an all-time celly right in their face.

So make sure to wish her a happy birthday and let’s kick some English ass.