Cleveland Police Car Gets New Bumper Dicker

From ClevelandScene.com:

There isn’t much more to the story than that, but the scant details…

Someone snapped a shot of a dildo stuck to the back of a Cleveland police cruiser and posted the shot to Facebook. That post has since been removed, but it spread, as things like this tend to do, across Snap and Instagram and Twitter.

Cleveland.com reports that the department is investigating, though that seems like a waste of time and effort.

Luckily the police have plenty of protection, and maybe someone was just trying to store their dildo in a safe place.

First of all, shout out to the algorithm that placed this ad with the story on ClevelandScene.com:

Now here’s a couple questions I wanted to call the Cleveland PD to ask, but was too afraid of clogging up their phone lines:

-What neighborhood did this occur in & do you have any leads?

-Is it against the law to put things on cop cars?

-Was the officer who had to remove the dildo laughing or are they just dead inside at this point?

-Has the dildo been placed in evidence collection?

-If so, will it be up for auction any time soon?

-If so, what is the date, time & location of this auction, and are out-of-state residents able to bid?

-If so, what do you think my odds of winning that thing are? ha ha Nahhh, just goofin’.

Real quick – Eyemuffs everyone but Cleveland PD.

Hey CPD, you can slide in my DMs @KateBarstool on Twitter or Instagram with follow-up information. Thanks.

Ok, you can all look again.

Have I worn the joke out yet? I have.

In closing, here’s a compilation of dildo trick shots. Happy Friday!