Getcha Popcorn Ready Because The Russo Brothers Are Officially Lifting The Avengers: Endgame Spoiler Ban On Monday
If you are one of the 10 people on the planet that still hasn’t seen Avengers: Endgame yet would be upset that someone spoiled it for you, please note that you have officially been put on the clock by the only two people on the planet that are allowed to say when spoilers can be unleashed since they just painted back to back masterpieces to end the Infinity Saga.
If you were having trouble carving out three hours over two weekends to watch what will become the biggest movie ever once we #TerminateCameron, now is the time to call in sick to work, break the bank to hire a babysitter, or move the giant boulder from whatever rock you are living under and walk to your local movie theater because the rest of us have been patiently waiting to unleash countless takes, memes, sweet ass references laced with the finest spoilers on the planet that we have been sitting on for days. If I want to compare an athlete to (SPOILER) or go Shady McCoy and say (SPOILER), I can now do that on Monday morning.
Would I have waited another week or month if the Russo brothers told me to? Probably. I think holding in the millions of memes my brain thought of while watching that movie because the internet has broke it is a fair tradeoff for the two guys that absolutely nailed the landing 11 years in the making. Missing out on all the Likes, Retweets, and #clout would have hurt the weird part of me that thinks internet capital is real. But not spoiling that landing for people that haven’t been able to see it because life can get crazy and tickets are still selling out at a wild pace is pretty much the most basic example of being a decent human in 2019. And if you can’t do that for your fellow man and woman, you deserve to be reduced to ash if a Snap ever happens in real life.
However, once Monday hits, we are allowed to rain chaos down on Twitter with memes of (SPOILER), that awesome moment when (SPOILER), and tweets like this (which is a SPOILER). If you don’t want to take a spoiler to the face, you have less than 72 hours. You have been warned.
For more Endgame talk, this time WITH spoilers, check me out on Robbie’s podcast My Mom’s Basement where we discussed the entire movie in absolutely ridiculous detail. Subscribe on iTunes or listen on Spotify.