Prince George Tells His Mum -Princess Kate Middleton- That She's Rubbish As Hell And A Full Kit Wanker

Apparently George, the future Duke of Brutal Honesty, holds nothing back with Kate when it comes to her soccer skillz. In fact, she revealed that her five-year-old literally tells her she’s trash when it comes too playing the popular sport. Granted, even an epic put-down like this sounds cuter in Britspeak.

”Mummy, you’re so rubbish,'” she said, quoting George, who is apparently just learning to play himself.

Big time dunk by this little silver-spooned ankle biter. Imagine how much it must get your knickers in a twist when the whole bloody staff is suckin off your mum footy skills when you know she’s rubbish. I’d be a tizzy lickety-split.

“Easy to get nutmugged innit, mum? Ya ole bellend.”

“Georgy Boy! I’m your mother and a princess. You mustn’t talk to me that way in front of the staff.”

“Oh fuck off. Your form is proper fucked and there’s no reason to play tiddlywinks around the matter. You’ll end up billy no mates on the pitch if you keep that up, mum. Pickin daisies out there, arentcha? All the help in the world and you couldnt shit a decent dribble in the midfield if it came up your own personal Westminster Abbey.”

“Of fuck right off, Georgy.”

“Oh right oh. Auntie Meghan is here. Perfect. She’s lookin thicker than the fog in ole London Town say I.”

“GEORGE!”