David Fizdale Brought An Ax Into The Knicks Locker Room To Motivate The Team. What Can Possibly Go Wrong?

Newsday- Perhaps the best idea for the Knicks right now would be to keep all sharp objects away from first-year coach David Fizdale. His lineup shuffling was intended to slow their struggles, but each move has seemed to make them worse. Fizdale procured a motivational tool – an actual tool – by bringing an ax into the locker room, having the players sign it and hoping that it will hold them together in hard times.

“My thing to these guys is what we’re trying to do. We’re trying to chop down a big tree,” Fizdale said. “If you’re paying attention to if the tree is falling, you’re never going to get that tree down. We signed a covenant as a group, every guy. I said, ‘Hey, let’s make a commitment that no matter what happens that we stick together and we keep chopping this tree together.’

“So the ax is just a symbol of us chopping this tree. Every day putting in the work with the right attitude. The right respect for what we’re trying to accomplish. And not let things linger, but keeping our eyes on the task of getting better.”

Hey Coach Fiz, I know you are new here and I appreciate how hard you have gotten this young team to play for you so far. But in case you haven’t been paying attention for ohhhh the better part of the last two decades, there is no NBA team on the planet that should have an ax anywhere near the locker room less than the New York Knicks. Don’t get me wrong, it would likely lead to a very bloggable moment that would make a very Merry Christmas in the Casa de Clem thanks to all the pageviews it would give Barstool. But I actually kinda love this young team that gives us fun games while also continuing to tank down the standings. I don’t want to have to worry about Mitchell Robinson losing a digit, Kevin Knox mistakenly getting slashed in the throat, or a still-recovering KP clumsily tripping over a fucking ax just because coach wanted to make a metaphor during a rough patch. And Kevin Durant sure as shit ain’t signing with a team that was just involved in an ax murder.

I know Fizdale doesn’t give a shit about data, but history tells us that there are certain teams that should not have an ax anywhere near their locker room: The Knicks, the Mets, the Jets, the Browns (especially when Gregg Williams is part of the coaching staff), whatever team Ron Artest is on. Oh yeah and the Jaguars, who literally lost a punter to a motivational ax injury during the Jack Del Rio era.

ESPN- When rookie coach Jack Del Rio placed a stump of oak and an ax in the Jacksonville Jaguars locker room a few weeks ago as a motivational technique, symbolic of his theme to “keep choppin’ wood,” it was viewed as a sophomoric technique by some veterans. Now the move is likely to be regarded as a huge mistake.

The Jaguars on Thursday lost Pro Bowl punter Chris Hanson for an undetermined amount of time — ESPN.com has learned that he will be sidelined 4-6 weeks and could well miss the balance of the season — when the fourth-year veteran was accidentally gashed on his right (non-kicking foot) while wielding the ax.

So clean it up Fiz and recognize that while you are coaching one of the marquee franchises in the NBA, it’s also been a goddamn circus that is a magnet for ludicrous stories like Amare shattering his hand on a fire extinguisher and Derrick Rose just disappearing for a night. And if you absolutely must have that ax around, keep it in James Dolan’s office at MSG.