An Internship That Pays $100 An Hour To Pet Puppies Seems Like A Pretty Decent Gig

CBS- MUTTS Canine Cantina, a pup-friendly restaurant and dog park in Dallas and Fort Worth, has announced plans for its first-ever fall internship. The eatery will hire their ‘Puptern’ to greet MUTTS members and their pets with adoration.

Let me start this blog off that I completely understand that this absolutely, positively has to be a ruse by the good people at Mutts. The saying “Too good to be true” applies to many situations. But getting an internship, let alone a paid internship, let alone a paid internship where you make $100 an hour to pet puppies has to be the fakest thing ever.

However, you still have to apply to that internship even if we are getting hoodwinked, bamboozled, led astray, run amok, and flat out deceived by Mutts. I don’t care if the puppies at this place are rabid or are actually people dressed up as puppies looking to get their fuck on as furries. Any internship where you can clock in one Benjamin Franklin for every 60 minutes of work is better than typical intern work, even if it’s a restaurant for cannibals. Do you want to get coffee for angry brokers at JP Morgan, clean up the potential shit on the bathroom floor at Barstool HQ, or pet whatever these crazy fucks at Mutts want to call a puppy? It doesn’t matter if you live nowhere near Dallas, are allergic to douchebag Cowboys fans, and your only other duty is to bury bodies for Jerry Jones (figuratively or literally), you have to be one of the 8 billion people to apply to this internship.

And yes I know the phrase “Too much of anything is bad”. But the person who said that also said “except for petting puppies. That never is bad. And if you think it can possibly be bad then you are bad and fuck you, you very bad person ” before they spit on you.

Now lets watch 10 minutes of puppies being good because it’s the end of the work day and we deserve it.