Wednesday Homestretch

After a Tuesday where major indexes had their best 1 day performance since March helping recover a chunk of last week’s hefty losses, we have stocks bouncing around today.

Overall, markets are down across the board but well off this morning’s lows, and we are seeing some pockets of strength in the Financials.

IBM is the biggest drag on the Dow with Big Blue off more than 7% on downbeat results.

Despite a deluge of negative analyst commentary going into their number, NFLX is a bright spot in Tech, up 3% after beat last night.

Alcoa reports after the close while American Express, Bank of New York, and PayPal all report tomorrow.

Canada has officially become the second country (after Uruguay) to legalize possession and use of recreational cannabis fulfilling a 2015 campaign promise by Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, who has argued that Canada’s near century-old laws criminalizing use of the drug have been ineffective, given that Canadians are still among the world’s heaviest users.

This isn’t just some random broad above… It’s Jayde Nicole, Playboy’s 2008 Playmate Of The Year, and she’s from Canada.

She may have been the third Canuck to win PMOY (preceded by Dorothy Stratten in 1980 and Shannon Tweed in 1982), but I remember her because she was also the first to win the award with a tattoo.  She has the word “RESPECT” inked right above where her pubic hair would normally reside had she not had soooo much RESPECT for her genitals that she wouldn’t dare cover them up with a single follicle of fur.

I do not doubt that Jayde RESPECTs her vagina, but a simple Google image search of “Jayde Nicole’s vagina” will confirm that she definitely doesn’t RESPECT its privacy.

I am told Aretha Franklin had a similar tattoo, but I am unable to confirm that.

And if that’s not the worst Canadian tattoo/target, then this certainly is…

Back to Canada itself… These new pot laws are designed to keep drugs out of the hands of minors and profits out of the hands of criminals, and their federal government also predicts it will raise $400m a year in tax revenues on the sale of cannabis.

Moving on… Going to a charity event to support HOH tonight.

At first I thought “HOH” stood for “Hookers On Heroin”, so you can imagine my dismay when I learned it actually stands for “Heal Our Heroes”, a charity that helps out with mental health care for veterans.

The gig is run by Cons, one of the Barstool vets who runs the award winning Zero Blog Thirty podcast, and it’s going down at Gotham Comedy Club.  Francis will be performing with a handful of other comedians, and I will be bringing the bride… So if any of you bitches are looking to check if my carpet matches my drapes, you’ll have to take a rain check on that vein check, because my lady doesn’t play any games.

Here’s the flyer:

Last thing-  As I get more interested in the world of MMA, some weirdo informed me of a defunct contact sport I was never aware of, that combined MMA and arm wrestling.

It was called XARM, where competitors were tied together with a strap and were then allowed to punch, kick, elbow, or knee their opponents in an attempt to either knock them out or pin their hand.

It started in 2008, and ultimately went the way of “SlamBall” (which I also fucking loved), but I am holding out hope that it might experience some kind of resurgence because it might just be McGregor’s last option to stay relevant after people realize his whiskey is terrible.

Take a report.

-Large