Horrifying Moment In The British House Of Commons: Sergeant-At-Arms Drops His Sword

Tough day to be Kamal El-Hajji. You’re the only guy allowed to be armed while inside the House of Commons, and you blow it. How about a little respect for the position, Kamal? Double-check that belt buckle next time? The house is a reverent place. It was here, to the House of Commons, that Churchill delivered his famous “We shall fight on the beaches” speech. Might be my favorite speech of all time, behind like 7 or 8 halftime speeches in movies. Lots of other great moments have happened here, I’m sure. Go ahead and google it.

Honestly, I don’t care about the sword drop. I’m just joking around in that first paragraph. The only reason I blogged this was because of what happened next. What in the name of GOD was he lifting up there? Twitter calling it the ceremonial mace, but JESUS that thing was comically enormous! I spit out my earl grey and I was just getting to the honey sludge at the bottom when he hoisted that thing over his shoulder. Like he was leaving the base lodge after the après-ski and throwing his skis over the shoulder for the awkward hike down to the cabin. Imagine if he’d dropped the mace? There’d be a hole in the floor.

Anyway–best of luck to the Serjeant (damn Brits spelling everything their own way). Do a few forearm exercises, throw a sandpaper grip on that sword handle, and come back tomorrow with a better sense of the stakes pal. Good DAY, sir!