Trend Alert: Hold On To Your Pumpkin Butts

Take a hayride out to the ‘ol Internet Patch & you’ll see that Ass Eatin’ Szn just got real messy (and autumnal).

Cosmo is calling this sexy style a trend but sadly, besides the two above, a #PumpkinButt Instagram search yields 97% baby/toddler butts with tiny pumpkins either held over or painted on them. I was delighted but feel like that’s not really the wheelhouse of this audience.

Besides that there’s a few pumpkins that look like butts (cc: Chaps) and people with their fully-clothed butts sitting on pumpkins but nothing crazy.

There’s also this interpretation of #PumpkinButt that I’m including strictly for pandering purposes.

I don’t want to be a hater but as for the glitter pumpkin butt thing, you’re gonna find glitter all over the toilet seat & your underwear drawer for months. Best case scenario, it’s stuck in someone’s beard the next morning.

Personally as I continue to struggle with completely quitting smoking (I’ve been pretty good for the most part, but still…) there’s only one kind of Pumpkin Butt that appeals to me & it’s in an ash tray. Can you imagine this with a pumpkin spice coffee in the morning? Aghhhh…