A Serial Cat Killer Has Struck Again, Killing At Least 13 Cats In Washington Since February

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New York Post – A sicko serial cat killer has been terrorizing parts of Washington State – carving up at least 13 felines and leaving their mutilated bodies in public places.

Many of the felines have been found in Thurston County with “surgical-type mutilations” from a knife or scalpel, according to local news station WGNTV.

I’ll be the first to say it. Dogs>Cats every day of the week. It’s really not even close. I’ll even admit to the fact that throughout the last 5 years of my life I’ve shared a household with 3 different cats, and I still have no issue coming out and saying they’re the worst.

My senior year of college my roommates and I adopted a kitten from the local Humane Society and within like 3 weeks he had declared himself the breadwinner and alpha male of the apartment, completely dismissing us unless he needed another living thing with thumbs to clean up his shit or put some more food in his bowl. His name was “Lil’ Jon” though, so that was pretty cool of us I suppose.

That being said, some of the details from the story are here are downright shocking and even more disturbing…

Some were slit down the stomach and had their spines removed before being splayed out in “posed” positions – which could’ve only been done by a person, said Olympia Police Lt. Sam Costello.

This isn’t some normal dog lover who got sick and tired of the neighborhood cats making homes for themselves under his front porch or killing the songbirds that he likes to masturbate to watch from his window while they snack atop a bird feeder; this man, or woman, is a straight up sociopath.

I don’t know if any of you have ever slit an animal’s stomach open and pulled out it’s spine, but it’s not exactly easy to do, and you best believe it’s gonna make a mess. We’re talking about a job that needs to be executed with medical precision. These aren’t random killings resulting from periodic fits of rage; it’s pre-meditated cat murder.

Whether you hate cats or love them, you have to feel for some of these owners who ultimately found their beloved pets brutally murdered and dismembered. One of the victims, Harley, was 20 years old and deaf.

“He didn’t want to be indoors, so (he) lived in our yard,” she told USA Today. “He was deaf and lacked muscle tone; disliked people but came to love my husband and myself, as we loved him.”

She added: “It is heartbreaking that he was killed and hurt in the way he was.”

On one hand, I can’t think of many worse feelings than what Kathy Harrigan must’ve felt when she looked outside and saw her already pitiful pet dead and split wide open down the middle like baked potato. Harley never stood a chance; he certainly couldn’t hear his killer coming.

On the other hand, and to paraphrase the famous words of Michael Scott, when you come across a cat that looks the feline version of Melisandre the Red Woman when she takes off her necklace and also lacks to ability to hear, do we even bother caring about it’s death? I mean what quality of life do we have there?

Either way, I hope that Harley, Ollie, Tubby the Cat, and the 10 other victims they’ve already identified are in a better place now. As for the owners in mourning, now you can go get a dog like the rest of the functional members of society.