Zion Williamson Rules

Let’s get this out of the way right from the get go: I realize this game meant next to nothing. Scrimmaging Ryerson University, which Google keeps insisting to me is a real college that exists on this plane of reality, isn’t exactly the same as going into Chapel Hill. With all that being said: Zion Williamson remains fucking awesome.

This college season is going to be wildly annoying because everything he does is going to be judged as if it’s Game 7 of the NBA Finals. The biggest high school phenom of the Instagram era, so much so that when his height and weight measurements came out last week people were already saying he was too big to make it in the NBA (right now he’d be the second heaviest player in the League.) Don’t let those people ruin this year for you. Whenever you hear someone say, “All he can do is dunk.” You come right back at them with, “Yeah dunking is fucking awesome.” Because it’s true and they’ll feel like a nerd for being anti-dunking. Plus, he doesn’t *just* dunk. He also swats shots like an absolute maniac.

Those are the two things he does at an accelerated level coming into college: elevate and defend. He’s also solid in the open court with the ball. If he adds a consistent shot, that would be cool. I don’t anticipate that coming easily, mostly because he’s potentially the strongest young man on the planet so finesse and muscle memory from downtown might be impossible until he’s done filling out. The bottom line is that you should spend the next year enjoying the hell out of watching this kid play before he turns pro. The only good reason there is to hate Zion is that he plays for Duke. Which I wont argue with, Duke is trash.