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Humans Kept Trying To Separate A Gay Swan Couple So The Swans Reacted By Straight Up Drowning A Guy

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Source -  A pair of swans in Austria have been forcibly removed from the lake they called home after a series of violent, escalating attacks to defend their nest from intrusive humans.

The twist in this case is the swans weren’t biological parents, but appear to have been two gay male swans who had formed an inseparable bond – and the nest they were protecting didn’t actually contain eggs or cygnets, but at least one colourful plastic cup.

Last summer, the pair were known to approach people and boats and display aggressive gestures, but this year the attacks “reached a new dimension”, according to the mayor of Grundlsee, Franz Steinegger, in the Austrian state of Styria.

“They have thrown themselves on the swimmers, trying to submerge them,” Steinegger told Kleine Zeitung. “That was the biggest danger.”

While nobody drowned, numerous bathers and people simply strolling beside the lake are reported to have suffered attacks – and some of them were serious. Several swimmers in fact required hospitalisation, with one of them receiving a deep flesh wound to the head courtesy of the protective parents.

Love is love. It doesn’t matter what species you are, if you try to come between it you may end up at the bottom of a lake courtesy of a pair of sassy swans. This story isn’t all that unfamiliar. After decades of being marginalized and pushed to the fringes of society, the swans finally snapped. Years of suppressing their feelings came out in one swoop of the wing. The man who they were trying to drown survived and apparently called the cops because the swans were arrested. But not before sending a few other homophobic onlookers to the hospital. Good for them.

You have to feel bad for the kid though, which in this case was a plastic cup. He’s going to lose everything: his parents, a wonderfully decorated nest (equip with a heated stick floor and bidet), and the privilege of being able to say he has two happily married dads. Gay marriage isn’t so fun where there’s divorce involved. As much as it pains me to say, I can’t imagine these two would stay together behind bars. It would make a great TLC show, but they’re going to hate each other after this. They were already aggressive to begin with.

 As for the exact circumstances of the pair’s relationship, it’s difficult to be certain – as it is with many cases of animal homosexuality – but Groder at least has some ideas about where the physical aggression could be stemming from. “It may be two male swans living in a relationship,” Groder told The OÖNachrichten.. But one of them is strongly suppressed by the other, and I could imagine that the aggression comes from there as well.”

Not in a dom/sub way either, in a “I hate my life” way. Maybe that’s why all swans are so aggressive. Because they’re gay. They should take a page out of dolphin’s book and embrace it. Life’s much better that way. Thoughts and prayers to the families of both the victims and the swans. It’s a sad day in the gay community indeed.

PS: Swans – absolutely terrifying.