Cowardly French Butchers Beg Government For Protection From Militant Vegans

Time – An organization representing French butchers has called for the government to stop violence from what it calls “militant” vegans.

Jean-François Guihard, the president of the French Confederation of Butchery (Confederation Francaise de la Boucherie Charcuterie-Traiteur), wrote a letter to Interior Minister Gerard Collomb, which was published on the confederation’s website and Facebook page on Monday. According to France 24, Guihard sent the letter last week.

The letter expresses the concerns of 18,000 butchers in France regarding what it calls the “authoritarianism” of vegans seeking to impose their meat-free beliefs on others through “propaganda (the famous fake news).”

As well as complaining about the apparent media attention given to vegans, Guihard’s letter says that “militants” have “called for violence against local shops” and refers to a vegan who “rejoiced about the murder of our colleague in the Trèbes terror attack.” In March, vegan cheesemaker Myriam-Serge Jouglet was convicted of condoning terrorism after posting on Facebook that butcher Christian Medves, killed in the supermarket siege that month, was an “assassin” and his death was “justice.”

Listen the fuck up, Jean-Francois of the French Confederation of Butchery, you fucking rat. You need to get it together, pal. Get it together immediately. You’re giving every meat eater, everyone who’s ever enjoyed a fat, juicy medium rare steak on a July afternoon, a bad name. You’re making us all look like giant pussies with this move right here.

Thanks for your service in the meat industry. I’ll give you that and I mean that from the bottom of my heart. But if that’s the life you’re gonna live, you can’t go around crying to the government every time some vegans get angry and throw red paint on your business’s entrance. You can’t call mom and dad every time a bully shakes his fist at you and calls you names, especially if that bully is a kale eating, probably green poop taking vegan asshat like what we’re dealing with here.

Let them throw their blood and pee in their fancy handwoven hemp capris. It ain’t gonna change nothing. Big meat needs to realize that’s all they’ve got in their arsenal. They’re not showing up with meat cleavers and sending guys home bloodied, with the inability to finger their French wives or gently stuff a pork tenderloin before slow roasting it and serving it over a bed of fresh greens. I’m talking about knives and guns and other deadly weapons; it’s just not happening. These are angry vegans, folks. Eventually the lack of protein in their diet will come into play and they’ll probably tire and disappear, but until then we need to just weather the storm.

I say we because I would classify myself as a carnivore and for that reason I’m taking up arms in this fight. That being said I think Jean-Francois should be banished from the meat gang immediately. As the face of what is likely to go down as the softest letter ever written by a confederation of French butchers, Jean-Francois is gonna have a hard time living this shit down. I’ll go one step further and say the only meat our friend Jean-Francois should be allowed to beat is, in fact, his own. I’ve been building up to that one for a while now and I’ll admit it felt really good to unload. Thank you for your time.